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Hi guys, Just dropped by to wish you all a good Thanksgiving (I know it will not be "happy" for many), but maybe those of you who are just beginning on this journey can make it good for yourselves somehow (?) The Holidays are fast approaching so I needed to write this now if unable to later!
I have been very, very busy generally speaking, trying with work. It's been a lot for not too much $ LOL Oh so typical Got quite sick for a while, fatigued with all sorts of weird things going on - all without explanation. I think this was just my body speaking to me - yelling "stop" "pay attention, you need to slow down, make some changes" Soooo I did. I have ... re working.
I still exercise although not as frequently - but regularly (due to work). Still meditate although without the best results ( due to work). GALl but not too much (due to work, income is small - & can't always say "yes")
h is very much around. I did what was suggested - just friends. Good thing too, because there were days I could see the 'crap-pretend self' emerging in between his personas or whatever that was. All this, until not too long ago!
H seems to have a more heightened interest in child, C. Interest in parent's well being (although spotty), where there was disdain before. And wanted to get me "something special". We hugged good bye and he was more cuddly than usual.
There are times, I still don't know what is real or not re h. I am still trying to determine if we will be a good fit for each other in the long term. I see no urgency in hurrying to find out I am enjoying what I can with C.
The Holidays will be modest but good. However, I listen to music as I prepare - music is happiness in sound for me So my fellow dbers, again a very Special, meaningful, holiday Season to you ALL. Make it so. I do hope to jump in again but boy does time fly! p.
pbetra ---- M: 15 yrs (in 2014) BD: 6/03/2014 Infidelity ('known' from July 2014) Denied PA Feb 2015 2 leave Mar 2015 (left early Summer). Some contact. Back briefly 2017 (after family death) Separated 2017