I'm reminded of some comments from an Andrew G Marshall book - MHDLMAITSE.
"It's human nature to want to concentrate on the nice parts of rebuilding your relationship...cuddles, nights out...However, it is equally important to look at the nasty stuff, for example acknowledging anger, unexpressed hurt or working on changing communication. In this way you will be dismantling the wall between you one brick at a time (with each positive interaction) rather than trying to pretend it doesn't exist or looking for magical ways to blast it away.
In effect, you will be able to stare into the darkness, but still stand firm. Slowly but surely, you will discover some grey amog the black and even a few spots of light. If you can live in the moment, rather than worrying about next week, month or year, you will be able to talk calmly and your (spouse) will respond better. Slowly but surely, you are developing resilience and that's a great skill to posess - whatever happens next."
Good post, Toots. I think this quote is very true. It's not fun to talk about the painful parts. It is necessary to address them in order to grow and have a healthy R.
Glad to see things are still progressing well, Jefe!
Me: 30 H: 35 M: 5 years S2 Signs of MLC started Feb 2014 BD - PA July 2014 Piecing/reconciling late July 2014