Barry, I understand how you feel. I STILL sometimes feel that way when I read posts around here (even my own to people). I think to myself, Maybe we're too far removed from the first days - the anguish, the sadness, the despair - because the words that some of us say just come across as downright inconsiderate of "newbies'" current feelings.

It's not my intent to be inconsiderate.

But sometimes, the truth hurts. And I could not have said it better than HP did up there, especially this:

Your reaction to the 2x4s in your last post is part of the reason you are here now. There is no way around that.

I feel a great deal of compassion for where you are right now. I was there, too. When I first came here almost nine years ago, I was sappy, spineless, pathetic, wimpy, sad, hopeless, etc., too.

Maybe it would have helped temporarily soothe me to have someone holding my hand and saying sweet things during those first few days and weeks. But it wouldn't have helped save my M.

And that's why you're here, right?

M: 40 H: 44
Married 14 years
S11 & D6; D20 & D19 from previous M
2BDs/PAs, 8 years apart
Piecing: April 2014