Thank you so much for that 25, and the rest of you. Your words are very comforting, and I needed it. You are right, of course, she wasn't ashamed of me. I was mostly speaking out of my own regret. Being the firstborn child, I wanted to always make my parents proud. She was so shocked (and quite concerned) when she found out about OM, but she did not fail to let me know she still loved me very much. We were very close, and I already miss her so much. I am so blessed to have had her.
Thank you all.
I'm quite certain you made her proud, Sandi. As parents, we are usually most proud not of our "perfect" children, but those who face adversity and even poor choices, and then fight with integrity to make amends and live a life of quality. Even if it ENDED with that, I'd be super proud, but to then give of yourself the way you do . . . impressive, Sandi.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Sandi. I just lost my father-in-law the day before yesterday, and he was like a "1b" to my own dad's "1a" as a father to me. It's horrible.