Originally Posted By: sandi2
From what I KNOW already - that is not by lashing out of even being pushy

And if you are anything like me, that is very hard to do. I have to wait FOREVER before my H can finally spit a few words out of his mouth.

Good job! Be proud of yourself.


There were times I felt so tempted to blurt out something "important", but held my tongue. And I've never regretted it (yet!). There are times that silence is golden and there are times that silence is the most loving thing to Not say...

But gosh it's hard. Like, Mother Teresa hard....

Congrats to you, T0.


I want to give you my condolences about your mom, but don't know if there's a thread for that. If not, then w/T0's permission, I'll briefly hijack to tell you this:

I'm so sorry for your loss. The loss of a mother is among the hardest losses to face. I ache for you.

Sandi, you are a mother of d's as am I. You seemed to believe your mom felt shame or disappointment in you. It's one thing for us to see our children make choices we know won't end well, and a totally different thing to feel "Shame" because of them.

Based on your MANY posts here and all the help you provide, and what You have said about your family of origin and your own relationship with your d, I feel safe to say, There's no way your mom held anything against you; she was your biggest fan in the bleachers.

She loved you through all that and she loves you still, even now. Because love never dies.

May you find comfort in the knowledge that you will someday see her again,

and that your mother now rests in the arms of a loving God.

((( )))

T0, sorry for the hijack!

Last edited by 25yearsmlc; 01/15/15 08:26 PM.

M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
I File D 10/16
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

Embrace the Change