TO - sounds like you have a lot to be at peace over, if you saved your marriage once, held on to your changes...and he's still making the same choices and generally giving very few f*&^s.

Please hold a thought close to you to chase out the desperation and keep that peace with you - you deserve more than this and you are better than this! You are worth loving and someone that is deserving of some pursuit, themselves.

May be time for you to be the WAS, at least emotionally to start, and get on with creating a better future and environment for yourself and your family.

Mid 30's
Psych-abusive M with violent tantrums from XH
D 9/15; NC forever on

You can't DR your way out of abuse.