Thank you so much for your post LisaB. You're right about not listening to her. She does say things immediately to lash out in defense and then hasn't followed through on any of them. I'm the only one who follows through here. She even had the nerve to text and ask me if I had bought gifts for S11 yesterday. I answered "Seriously?" She is really not thinking and saying whatever pops into her head. I will act as if it doesn't matter.


S11 is having a great Christmas he says. He said he was worried how it would turn out but he got his presents so he's good. W did open presents with him last night. Today he got presents from me. He's having a great time showing me his games. We'll go out for brunch later. We're fine.

W did contact me today... my paycheck was deposited to our joint account. She texted me at 7am to let me know. I know she checks our bank account everyday by habit. Showing trustworthiness by telling me the money was there without taking any like she has before. Good, b/c I wasn't expecting the money until tomorrow. I moved it all to my private account. It is so sad that I'm looking at my W like she's a thief.

Also, she sent me an FB friend request this morning around the time S11 called her to tell her about the great gifts a gave him... including the latest expensive laptop he wanted. She un-friended me after I told her I knew about her PA, lies, stealing, and when I told her FB shows her location on the post when she posts to FB from OM house. I'm not accepting her request to be friends for the moment. She may rescind it like she did the last friend request immediately after she un-friended me. So what? I don't think I'll accept it.

I won't see her today. Saw her last night and it was not cheery. Maybe just barely polite from me. She cheerly said "Hello HP" for S11. I was businesslike. I'll get better at it.

Wow it's already been almost 3 months since BD. Most of the first 2 I was really in denial land about the depths of her A and trying to nice her back into our M. Thought I would live with her for 6 months next year and we would reconnect in that time. Never would have imagined how it turned out so far. Lose the expectations is right.

For now... My son is happy. I can make a peaceful space for myself today. The sun is out. I have 2 beers left in the fridge. S11 brought home S'mores Pop Tarts to eat. All things to feel wonderful about right now.

I really hope you find something to feel wonderful about today too.

Merry Christmas all.

Last edited by HPoirot; 12/25/14 04:03 PM.

Me: 44
W: 45
S: 11
Married: 15
Together: 18
BD: 9/29/2014
OM discovered: 10/16/2014
I left her behind: 12/14/2014