From here, it looks like she's just trying to assert control. You state a boundary and she tramples over it. When she sees that she's losing, she backs off to save face. Something tells me you'll know when there is an emergency. In the meantime, it's perfectly fine to ignore her and enforce your boundary. She'll learn.
You mention that other LBS are hoping for more contacts, but it's for different situations. In your case, it seems the normal DB course to go dark until OM is out of the picture.
By the way, three months into my separation and there's never been an emergency for my two young daughters. Sadness is not an emergency.
M39 D6 D3 (at S) S 2014-09 D 2016-09
"You can't start a fire sitting around, crying over a broken heart" - Bruce Springsteen.