Okay, I want to document low PMA in the moment so I can try to figure out how to combat it. Right now I'm feeling:
1.) Resentful of the fact that that BF has gone NC and I'm needy for contact. I don't know why. I recognize that he needs space and time and that we most likely will speak again in the future, even if that's a long time down the road.
2.) Unncessarily worrying about whether or not BF intends to magically change for OW and whether or not their R will implode sooner, rather than later.
So as Mozza suggestst, I'm going to count to three and remind myself this is a marathon and not a sprint. Nothing will change today, I can let go for the next minute until it turns into the next and so on. NO ONE knows the future and mind reading and guessing and assuming doesn't help.
And I'm going to go back and read my thread to remind myself why I should be in the angry space and not the depressed space!
EDIT: I think it's the time. For the past 10 years about now is when I'd be thinking of leaving work to go home to BF.....
ME: 38 BF: 40 T: 10y, no kids, no M (by choice) BD: 7/14/14, BF admits to PA, wants out, lies about new R. 10/1/14: I move out, BF lies about move in with OW 12/4/14: OW confronted, reveals all the lies