At least you are both involved in raising your kids. That is something you should both be proud of. Remembering back when I was married, I don't recall my h stepping up and really getting involved with the kids much. Of course s18 was sick then and there were endless labs and dr visits and hospital stays. I don't think I am rewriting history, he just wasn't really involved except for playing with them.
So be glad that even with the divorce you are still both very active parents and when able to, you present a united front.
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory