Yes, I would be upset if my parents split up now and I'm almost 42. My whole foundation would be rocked. I honestly think that most marriages can and should be saved. I know some say "I was so unhappy I had to get out". I believe they feel that way, I have no doubt, I've had those fleeting feelings too, but I also believe that if the other person is happy and content, then you have to realize that there is something missing, it's not the marriage persay, but something that needs to be addressed and changed. How easy would it have been for my H to say ... lets sit down, I need to really talk to you. I'm not happy and something needs to change. I need .... 1)more support from you with my dreams, 2)more affection, 3) more attention ... how can we make that happen and both of us happy? Let's figure this out. But for me I believe, sometimes it's something within that person too... I know it is for my H. He is so unhappy with himself, that he won't ever be fully happy, no matter how much he runs or who he runs too.

Agreed, our H's aren't thinking with all of their brains ... just the selfish part or maybe even the sick part. And of course with that other little brain - south of the border!


Me: 41
H: 43
M: 21 yrs
DD: 15

1st bombshell: 2002 - 6 months
2nd bombshell/moved out: 10/03/2012
OW: 10/12/2012
Signed MDA & PP: 11/20/12; but not submitting
Confirmed OW living with H: 11/21/12