God I'm havin nightmares about this. Yesterday I dreamed about my time in the Navy when I felt like the world was out to get me. I went home and she was gone, only that was the nightmare. In reality she was the sweetest and most supportive person I've ever known and I treated her like s*** back then. Then when I 180d it was too late and she got involved with this jerk that's disrespected me and been pursuing her for years. From what I hear he's using her to support his financial needs and pressuring her for sex then not doing a thing to help hr out.

I woke up crying my eyes out after for 30min. I'm doing better with my GAL but that was only after complete saturation from thinking about this for days. What hurts is knowing she is gong through the same thing but won't ever admit it to me. I see the misery every time she calls an I cheer her up but I'm only enabling her.

She knows I've 180 like crazy and calmed down so much since then and painstakenly gotten rid of some addictions and bad habits that drove her away. So her expectations of me are a lot better but the last words I said were "goodbye J" in a text. I just couldn't talkto her after exposure of her EA. I didn't even try to deny I was dating (I'M NOT! I'm DBing), but I got tired of her constantly asking me and then losing interest when I said I wasn't, so I let her think I was w/o PA. I don't know if it was right or wrong. I'm losing motivation. And I use to be so good at this.