Mike when I suggested you have your third party handle this info I am NOT suggesting you ask them to PASS a letter obviously written by you TO her...
I am suggesting that you put these boundaries together as a plan of attack for your family here...
Right now they likely don't know what boundaries to suggest or anything... How ARE they pressuring her specifically right now?
What kind of influence are they exerting specifically...
Where I am going with this is that your FAMILY can say
"WE don't trust you right now, your words mean little to US... WE have been lied to... WE would like you to attend FT for at least five months to be comfortable you are giving this marriage exit some serious thought... WE would like a letter sent to the OM by you and US.."
etc...
YOU don't send her anything. This way YOU aren't the bad guy.. her own family takes the hit...
I am NOT suggesting you appear to HIDE behind them.
My suggestions is to offer her family guidance in concrete specifics that are needed to allow repair work to begin... they likely have no idea...
You can just sit back and let them handle it and be the bad guy...
HOPEfully she turns to YOU when they give her a hard time...
see?
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712