Originally Posted By: Allen A
Much of the discomfort you are feeling right now HE is feeling as well..

Exposure puts HIM in the same spot as you... public, awkward, embarrassing, stressful, frustrating...

When you kept his activities secret HE got to carry on and not have to deal with any pressure.. it was all on YOUR shoulders...

NOW its on both of you... HIM moreso since he's the one who looks like an a$$ to everyone he has to interact with... And he very likely HATES it...

Keep the pressure on through third parties while YOU keep your distance from him and work on getting healthy and making yourself and your home more inviting a place to return to...

The pressure to END the affair is TEN TIMES as important right now as you working on improving the home... Keep the exposure going... follow up... Make sure any LIES your H has spread are dealt with immediately... He WILL lie to anyone you exposed to.

He will :

a. Deny the affair
b. Tell people you are crazy
c. Tell people YOU are cheating
d. Tell people you are on medication and aren't taking it regularly

he will spin a long song and dance about how horrible a wife YOU are and that's why "HE" chose to move out...

Follow up with anyone he spins stories to and set them straight...


"What is best for my kids is best for me"

Persevere = happily being patient over a long period of time