Originally Posted By: Coach
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That's always been my biggest concern with the LRT strategy in terms of spouses who have felt neglected. I know that often when I pull away, my W has felt like I'm cold and withdrawn.
Call bull$hit on that one. Cause that is EXACTLY what it is: I (WA) want out and you (LBS) won't beg me to stay. You won't allow me to manipulate you anymore, therefore, you must be cold. Don't fall for it.
If it was me I would be wary of using the LRT on the WAS who felt neglected. If they felt "invisible, "you don't understand/see me," or "unloved" then you need to be able to show love (lovingly detach), don't put up with CB (boundaries) and take care of yourself (GAL). How are you going to change their feelings of neglect? How would you make them feel "seen," understood, supported, cared for and loved? Which feelings are you trying to validate? I understand the detaching can appear cold. Activity creates warmth.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"

Persevere = happily being patient over a long period of time