Don't feel bad about weeping. I'm lucky. My desk faces away from everyone so when I have my daily pity party, no one really notices, or at least pretends not to notice. There's nothing wrong with grieving. You've tried SOOOOOOO hard, and you have nothing to be ashamed about. This isn't about screwing up your life, this is about your wife leaving. Let her go. Pick up the pieces of your life, put them together, take care of your kids, and eventually this pain will fade to a dull throb. God be with you.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712