Swimming against the current - PH in piecing

[pearlharbr]

Aver, I feel bad that my post may have caused you pain. Perhaps X did feel the same way, but he should've been man enough to bring it up before he hooked up with OW.

I'm really trying not to just up and leave BF one day because I can't take it anymore. I've told him how I feel that something is missing, that I do love him and I'm trying to make it work. I'm doing things to bring the spark back and hoping it works. But I also want him to be forewarned in case it doesn't. I don't think it's fair to either one of us to continue for another 10 or more years if I don't fully love him.

I don't think there's anything more BF can do. He has made some changes for the better, but ulitmately he is who he is. And I am no longer attracted to that person. I used to think that I made my choice to be with him so I had to stick with it no matter how I felt now. After meeting someone with whom I have so much chemistry that my knees went weak when he looked at me I realized that I can still have that attraction to someone and I'm not sure I want to live the rest of my life without it. I know BF feels is for me and I am sad that I don't.

I'm not saying the feeling of the weight lifting is in regards to ending the R with BF, just with being able to make solid plans to move knowing that he understands why I need to do it and that he will be supportive. At least that's what my head and heart are saying. Maybe in the end you and my gut will turn out to be right.