Sandi (and everyone else too),

I spoke to a business associate today who has done some work in the family law arena for quite awhile. I told him about my sitch and he was very concerned about my W's behaviors/attitude- his feeling is that my W may be beyond being caught up in the EA addiction and that perhaps this has progressed into a serious psychological problem for her. He was particularly concerned over my W's continuing obsession with OM and ongoing behavior despite what OM supposedly said to her about not wanting her in his life. We also talked about the effects of my W's self-brainwashing in her continuing behavior- all of the positive affirmations about OM she has repeated in her head over and over again these past six months.

My question to you is whether there are specific indicators I should be looking for that might suggest that my W's condition has deteriorated to the point of a serious psychological problem beyond what we have been discussing? Is there a possibility that my W may be in need of some sort of "de-programming" therapy due to her self-brainwashing? I just have not read enough myself on all of this to know.

BTW, she has not had a physical exam yet to rule out any potential hormonal issues (I know enough to steer way clear of that conversation with her- at least for now.)

Any thoughts on this would be appreciated.

M: 41
W: 39
S: 11
S: 10
D: 4
1st contact w/OM: 1/19/09
EA began: 2/14/09
EA discovered: 3/1/09
I file for D 8/25/09 to protect myself