pearl,

I feel for you! It's very difficult in this stage. Could you act dependent and open to him when you're together, but be independent when you're not?

I remember a post from Sandi early on in my sitch that basically was about what to do when the WAS starts coming back. You do have to remain detached, maybe even a bit more as the WAS comes your way. Picture it like this: It's the detachment, the distance between the LBS and WAS that "reels" the WAS back in. For the WAS to keep coming your way, you have to keep some level of detachment going, until the WAS is where you would like them to be.

It's a difficult line to walk. Every once in a while, my W comes my way a little bit and every part of me wants to jump right on it, but I know I shouldn't. I make sure we have a great time, but then I go back to trying to be as detached as possible. I call it a "hit and run" approach, "hit" them with something they are going to miss during the "run" period. In my mind it shows them what good times can be had with you if they choose to come back. Let them think during their time alone what they are missing out on.

I am rambling on, but I guess what I am trying to say is try to maintain some level of detachment. For your own sanity as well as to help BF realize he's not out of the woods yet.


Me:37/W:38
T11/M8
S12 S4 S4
Bomb 10/07
Sep 7/08-

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