Swimming against the current - PH in piecing

[pearlharbr]

I'm starting to feel like I can't do anything right here.

First I tell him what I'm looking for in a partner, the qualities of the person I want to be with. I don't tell him how I think that should be manifested because I don't want to tell him how to act or what to do. I want him to think about it and come up with actions he thinks will convey his feelings and show me he can be the partner I am looking for. People here said, "He's a man. You need to be specific. Don't expect him to be a mind reader."

So I come up with a transparency plan that will meet my needs. I give him a list (against my better judgment) of the things I need to be reassured. He does as expected, the bare minimum of what I outlined. People here say, "Don't tell him what to do, you sound like his mother."

I'm ready for a break from all the advice.