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When I start feeling bad, like "this is never going to happen for me, I will never have my family back", I stop myself and think about all the TIME I have to make what I want happen. Days, months, years. As long as it takes or as long as I am willing. How many times have you seen "patience is key"? Well, it really is.
I am in dark mode right now, we live separately, she is in an EA with a guy from work she sees every day, and I will very likely be divorced in time for Christmas. Sounds terrible huh? Only if I let it be.
Remember...with time all things are possible. Water and time made the Grand Canyon and I think that under all that fog, she still loves me somewhere...I'd swear I can see it in her eyes.
I could be wrong, but...
Let me be the water in our R. Constant but gentle, forever moving toward my goals.
So for me, right now, these are my short term goals:
Personal: Lose 6 more pounds. Run a sub 30-min 5K Bench press my weight
Relationship: Don't waver from the boundaries I have set in my interactions with STBXH. Try to make each interaction with her as possible (within my boundaries). Avoid triggers that may put me off my path.
H: 38 W: 36 S: 8 S: 5 M: 16 Bomb: 8/25/08 OM: 9/21/08 EA (Possible PA) with co-worker since 5/08 (at least...) Sep: 9/21/08 D Filed 9/23/08 My Situation