I've seen others mention 5 LL, guess I should probably pick it up one of these days.
I think counselors (good ones) exist to do exactly what you are looking for. There are also communication workshops that are really good - my parents went to one 5 years ago and gained a lot from it.
I think you should call and discuss things with the Counselor. You're paying for a service and if you know what you're looking for and that isn't what they do, you should know that up front. I look back at my sitch and I think 2 inappropriate counselors really screwed things up. One was just bad and the other was extremely good for IC, but not for MC and not action-oriented. So it left W feeling worse about things. Don't waste time - find out up front.
I'm sorry my W isn't approaching things as well. I know there is a lot I need to work on with myself and I'm doing so. The rest requires the input of another. I have to keep telling myself it isn't all my problem but it's hard not to take all of that on. Ultimately, though, I'm not a mind reader and I need to know what she wants in a R so I have the opportunity to provide that. Anyway, I have my own thread so won't burden this one with my ramblings.
Hope you aren't in the midst of all the storms! lodo