Yes, you are going to have to take the lead on this, or at least get the ball rolling. Women rarely do, unless they are lawyers or have lawyers that will push them along. Back in the day, male divorce lawyers used to do that, take that retainer and off they'd go, and before a woman knew it, she was divorced. Whoosh.
Doesn't work like that any more. Malpractice carriers have gotten quite twitchy about lawyers driving the bus. The problem is most clients can't act on what they want or can't really make a decision to pull the trigger. Doesn't mean they don't want to be divorced, they just don't as you say, want to go through the process to get there.
So it falls on those of us who are strong. It is why I sit here at this desk surrounded by paperwork for things that must be resolved before The Man Who Divorced Me and I will have separate lives again.
Sucks, but doesn't this all?
Be glad you are the one with the strength. It is a blessing.
"Go where your best prayers take you." -- Frederick Buechner