DnJ, I guess $200 isn't bad for the hour, but like you said previously, all I'm really looking for at this point is some information. Not sure how that'll take an hour. lol
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
DnJ, I guess $200 isn't bad for the hour, but like you said previously, all I'm really looking for at this point is some information. Not sure how that'll take an hour. lol
Have a list of questions ready. The more prepared you are, the more you get for your money.
Definitely visit a couple more lawyers that have a free consult. Compare them to each other. There may be one that is a better fit. You might see a difference in what a paid session gets vs a free.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
DnJ, I guess $200 isn't bad for the hour, but like you said previously, all I'm really looking for at this point is some information. Not sure how that'll take an hour. lol
Have a list of questions ready. The more prepared you are, the more you get for your money.
Definitely visit a couple more lawyers that have a free consult. Compare them to each other. There may be one that is a better fit. You might see a difference in what a paid session gets vs a free.
Good point about contacting other lawyers.
The other one I did call, the one I really wanted, is the one my W called for a consult. This pisses me off, because she was obviously referred by one of my best friends wife. They were over to hang out with us all evening last saturday, and W called the L a few days later. I'm going to bite my tongue around his W, but I think that's pretty damn rude.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Have my consultation with an attorney this afternoon. Damn, for some reason I'm nervous about it. Maybe because the reality of the sitch is starting to really hit home?
I foolishly snooped on W's computer last night (I know, I know), and saw she's been searching online for realtors, looking at rental properties, and googling ways to 'pay for divorce'. So I guess despite her being overly nice, talkative, etc, she's still planning her 'escape'. I'm more mad than sad about it though.
Which leads me to another question. Our son is 12, and Sunday is Mother's Day. Typically we'd get her a card, flowers, and some type of ornament type thing. Plus dinner. What should I do now?
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
It’s very standard for the WW to be overly nice after dropping the bomb on the LBS. Partly because of guilt and partly out of keeping it amicable for the children. She probably doesn’t hate you she just doesn’t want to be married to you anymore. She wants to have the excitement of a new relationship again. Only time will tell if it lives up to her expectations.
As for Mother’s Day, take your son to the store and have him pick something out for her. Remember Mother’s Day is about the relationship between her and him.
For son at 12 years old, my advice is different than for adult kids. Ask son what he’d like to do. A card? Flowers? A plant? A gift? A meal? (For even younger kids, less asking and more just doing with them.)
Then help son get the Mother’s Day acknowledgment/gift. Depending on what it is, you may or may not need to participate.
Just make it about supporting your young son giving his Mom a gift is all.
I understand the nervousness about the lawyer meeting. Getting some a knowns in the current sea of uncertain will help.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
Thanks guys. I'll probably just take son to a store and have him pick out a card and maybe some flowers or something.
Boat, yep good point. I don't think she hates me at all. She's just convinced that we'll never be, and never were 'happy'.
Again, I think some of her calculations and maybe expectations regarding an equitable division of debts are going to throw her for a loop.
I'll keep ya posted on what the L says, but what do I do after that? Just continue to BD and play the waiting game till she files? Tell her what my L had to say regarding the stuff she asked me to consider (custody, debt division, etc)? Wait till she brings stuff up again?
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Yes you play the waiting game. Let her come to you with what she wants and then you will have a chance to respond. What is discussed with your lawyer is none of her business.
