Wolfman Moving Forward 5

[BL42]

Wolfman,

Sorry you're still struggling with your relationship with GF and her interactions with your son. Not sure what to say that I haven't already, but definitely wishing you the best and agree w/bttrfly on consulting the L just in case.

Hang in there.

How'd the NBA game ticket surprise go with your son?

[kml]

Honestly she is a child mentally/emotionally. I have another child on my hands.

DING DING DING DING DING!!!!!!!!!!!

And she is doing damage to your son.

See a family law attorney and figure out the best way to get out of this and get adequate custody of your baby. SHE IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE.

[kml]

Oh - and stop sleeping with her (or get a vasectomy) so she doesn't get pregnant again.

[DonH]

Oh - and stop sleeping with her (or get a vasectomy) so she doesn't get pregnant again.

This is the real DING DING DING DING!!!!

Or at least it should be. Like too many situations the kids are the real losers here. The adults at least have/had a choice. The children did not. Your son didn’t get a vote when his family split apart. Then if not bad enough he didn’t get a vote with this new woman who somehow wants him to bow to her every whim. She doesn’t get a say. She’s not his mother.

I won’t even go into how F’d up new woman is but she’s already doing more damage to your son. THIS you must put a stop to. Don’t allow her to abuse him like this. It’s your choice if you want to allow her to continue to abuse you but he doesn’t get that choice and needs you to step in and protect him.

Then there’s the new baby. OMG. So sad but you can’t undo that either. But you most certainly can keep all of this from happening again. Please don’t take that responsibility lightly.

[Wolfman]

Hello everyone. Been a little while. I read those other comments. We are not active so that is not a problem. Honestly, i am scared to split up. How am I going to deal with another baby mama, what about the baby, how often will I see him, I will be able to pay another child support? I am petrified of all of this. This is why I continue to suck up this relationship. I do t know what to do. I understand only I can make a decision. I feel like a failure, I know I missed red flags, you all were telling me not to do this. I was so broken. I wanted to feel whole again, but went about it the wrong way. Lately I have been so depressed, I just feel like hopeless. If we break up what will that entail, stay together what will that be like day in and day out. I wish I had the strength to end it. Now she is telling me she needs a break, that she is so depressed and stressed. She wants to go visit family for a week with the baby. I feel different emotions about that, part of me wants her to go, the other part says is there more? I am just all over the place emotionally. Please call just need people to talk to. I am sinking fast. 😔
I know a lot of you want to tell me you told me so. I get it. All the mistakes I made. I just am looking for support.

[Rockon]

Here for support. What do you need today to get through Wolfman?

[Spiral]

Wolf,

Nobody wants to tell you we told you so. We all know why you did it. We were all there. We all felt the need to fill that void. We all wanted to fill it. It also doesn't matter if you failed yesterday. The past is gone. You have today. Don't fail today. Start by re-reading the book and by investing in yourself. Don't focus on where you are going. Focus on your next step on that road.

Best,
Spiral

[Ready2Change]

Hi Wolf,

Haven't followed your sitch for some time. Not really looking for answers from you, but more for you to reflect on:

How much have you changed since you arrived here?
What changes do you still want to make?
Do you know what a healthy relationship looks like? Can you move in that direction?
What type of IRL support network do you have? Has IC helped? Do you need more?
Why are you not "active" with your partner? What role did/does your behavior contribute?
Do you enjoy the drama? Can you change your behavior to reduce the drama?
How similar are X and GF? Did you attract the same "type" of women?


I wish you well. Make good choices.

Regards,

R2C