WAW w/Exit Affair or WW? - 1.5 Year Divorced (8)

[LH19]

Well, this is a first, two 10% ers fighting over me! I think I like it ! The bearded man and the one with the Aussie accent….. bring it on boys!!!

BL you have a 12,000km advantage over me, don't fuch this up!!

I do agree BL that it seems like you are looking for perfect or reasons why things can't work. You have to kiss a lot of frogs my friends, and its all experience and it all helps. Think of that movie Slumdog Millionaire, where everything that happened in his life helped him win that final prize.

By the way, I share a name with the ultimate MILF, stifler’s mom. Only it’s spelled much differently, the first 3 letters are that of my screen name here. Hint hint

Her screen name or real name? I'm not the most talented Facebook stalker, but I am curious to know what I'm competing against BL for

Would one of you two find her on Facebook because I’m starting to feel embarrassed for her lol. Sounds like j-rhymes with bean lol.

[OnlyBent]

Would one of you two find her on Facebook because I’m starting to feel embarrassed for her lol. Sounds like j-rhymes with bean lol.

My excuse is that I never use social media, though hearing how someone's kid hooked up on Insta, I might need to check that out. My need another hint, coming up short.

[Ginger1]

You’ll be disappointed, I don’t think I am as hot as your GF.

I’m just a regular girl. In a devils jersey. Who is ….een. On gin.

[OnlyBent]

You’ll be disappointed, I don’t think I am as hot as your GF.

I don't think anyone is as hot as my gf, but that's just my opinion. It's one of those things where we are both just ridiculously attracted to each other, more than just looks though.

I’m just a regular girl. In a devils jersey. Who is ….een. On gin.

Surely cannot fuch this up. Get moving BL!

[Mach1]

Thanks for that Mach. You're right, and I am doing that. But can't help feel guilty and the need to "make up" for their sitch at times either. Maybe that's me projecting my loss of a nuclear family onto them as well, and maybe they're just going to be OK with that. But I have had the sense I need to step up because of what ExW decided. I'm working to give them that enriched life and modeling the character and values I can. That'll have to be enough. Just need to give myself a bit of relief and grace for the part of the situation I can not fix.

So is guilt holding you back, or moving you forward ???

Maybe define the guilt to see what direction it's moving you in..

A good friend of mine asked me once.

Do you want to be defined by the worst thing that you have gone through ???

Guilt holding you back, keeps you defined by it....

Because you DO deserve some relief, and you do deserve some grace ( as long as Grace is okay with that : ) )


Cause even though "ExW decided". you've made decisions since then that have affected each of you positively, and you can't be stuck in what her decisions were...


Have you always been this hard on yourself ???

[BL42]

Well, this is a first, two 10% ers fighting over me! I think I like it !

Oh no OB, we're playing Chump Lady's "pick me dance"!

The bearded man and the one with the Aussie accent

Sounds like a circus side show, at least "the bearded man" lol

I got over my ex way faster than I got over another woman in my daughters life. It crushed me and killed me in every way.

So true.

I can tell you, that D sees me and only me as mom.

You are irreplaceable, my friend! You are the one and only DAD

Thanks for that.

Well to be fair I deleted my OLD profiles quite awhile ago, but LH you might be touching on some truth here...I do tend to look for the perfect fit / long term relationship as opposed to opening the aperture and just going on a casual date and having fun for what it is.

Yes! You need to just go on dates because it's going to be awkward. My guess is the woman you are looking for is going to have MANY options so when you find her you don't want to blow it on something stupid.

IMO you our so young and should be having tons of fun out there and not worrying about a relationship. That will come in time. Time to get that OLD profile worked out and give it another shot. You can't just go for top 10%ers you need to branch out a bit.

I do agree BL that it seems like you are looking for perfect or reasons why things can't work. You have to kiss a lot of frogs my friends, and its all experience and it all helps. Think of that movie Slumdog Millionaire, where everything that happened in his life helped him win that final prize.

You guys are probably right. I should be more open just to going out casually and having a good time - not narrowing done so much on the long term fit.

Just out of curiosity what's keeping you from the six pack other than about 10 pounds?

BL, I can tell you what keeps me from the six pack. You basically need like7% body fat and what I would have to give up isn’t worth it for me.

And as a woman in her early 40’s, who has many beautiful friends in their 30’s and 40’s, we really couldn’t give 2 sh!ts about a 6 pack. Sure they fun to look and touch sometimes? Sure. Just like big knockers. But it would simply be ab extra and doesn’t make us say “I need to date that guy” I’m sure LH knows more on that subject than me and the kazillion of women I am surrounded with everyday. But yeah, maybe a 6 pack was cool in my 20’s, but it’s so low on my list of things that make me want to date a guy now. So don’t worry about it. You sound fit, active, and you’re funny. Flashing your abs on an online dating site isn’t going to get you what you want

Yeah - a 6 -pack is nice, but a guy who is obsessed with his own body and won't eat anything fun is kind of a turn off.

Point taken, all. Not a requirement for dating...but guessing it doesn't hurt my case either! 6 pack abs isn't really my specific goal, but I did very well in the gym in January and plan to continue consistently throughout the rest of the year, so assuming good things will come of that. Worry about the process, not the result; the results will follow, right?

Just out of curiosity who is your doppelganger? I am thinking a young John Cusak.

Interesting question. I'll have to survey my friends. I don't see John Cusak. Could've sworn there was some speculation on the topic awhile back but for the life of me can't find the thread. Think OB may have guessed Robert Downey Jr?

I'd love to meet a guy at the gym who is moderately into working out but not obsessive.

Hmmm...sounds like someone I know. Maybe we should date, kml! The competition anxiety is on you now Ginger, how about that Pick Me Dance? ;-)

I've never actually met a date at the gym though, although maybe once or twice a guy has said something flirtatious to me. I tend to go into my own "cone of silence" though when working out so I probably have missed some signals.

Eventually I'd like to get back to working out in the gym instead of at home, maybe I need to pay more attention to the guys around me in the future.

Maybe you should step out of that cone. Many guys aren't sure about approaching because they don't want to disturb your workout or cause awkwardness in the future. If you're more open and even initiate I bet good things happen.

When I would do a water exercise class, he would stand at the upstairs window and wave to me and make goofy faces - all the women in the class thought that was great because he was very handsome and looked like an athlete.

Want me to come wave at you and make them jealous?

By the way, I share a name with the ultimate MILF, stifler’s mom. Only it’s spelled much differently, the first 3 letters are that of my screen name here. Hint hint

Her screen name or real name? I'm not the most talented Facebook stalker, but I am curious to know what I'm competing against BL for

Her screen name in that movie. Let’s see if you can find me !

Would one of you two find her on Facebook because I’m starting to feel embarrassed for her lol. Sounds like j-rhymes with bean lol.

My need another hint, coming up short.

I’m just a regular girl. In a devils jersey. Who is ….een. On gin.

Pretty sure they're punking us, OB. Curiosity got the best of me over the weekend and did a couple searches on both the character and actress names (modified with the hints) and came up with nothing either. And it's not like "name, new jersey, nurse" narrows it down all that much. ;-)

Oh yeah...I also Googled "LH-named Pitbull lookalikes who drink Mich Ultra and frequent the downer" as well but came up blank there too! 😂

My excuse is that I never use social media, though hearing how someone's kid hooked up on Insta, I might need to check that out.

FB and Insta? Ginger's daughter got asked by a boy for her SnapChat ID at the mall! Get with the times, OB!

[Ginger1]

I do not have snap. I’m old. Face book and insta it is.

You have never seen “American pie”, BL?!!

The spelling of my name is unique enough for me to pop up.

I’m not so afraid of identity being exposed because just about everyone on this board is my friend on the other side, lol

[LH19]

Oh yeah...I also Googled "LH-named Pitbull lookalikes who drink Mich Ultra and frequent the downer" as well but came up blank there too! 😂

If you can find G you can find me and I will take you to the downer for your for your b-day. lol

[LH19]

I do not have snap. I’m old. Face book and insta it is.

You have never seen “American pie”, BL?!!

The spelling of my name is unique enough for me to pop up.


I’m not so afraid of identity being exposed because just about everyone on this board is my friend on the other side, lol

FFS she gift wrapped it for you.

[job]

Ginger,

I removed the hints due to the Board policies. I know that you aren't afraid of people knowing who you are, but we should follow the policies. Again, I'm sorry.