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Happy Thanksgiving Cadet xoxo and Job xoxox and everyone else as well!


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"There's something awfully screwy going on around here!"

Walk along the side of the road with a bag & you're gonna end up with a lot of trash!
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Hey Job.

For the first time in a long time, I was feeling super down this evening. I think it is the holidays. My EX always made them so special. I put on some holiday music and that just made it worse. So, I decided to log in here. Behold! A new thread from Job. I don't post here much these days because I've suspected for a while that my EX knows about this site and has seen my posts. No proof...just a feeling. I don't know all the details of your sitch because you were well into your journey by the time I got here in early 2011, but I've always loved reading your posts. The advice is always spot on. I just wanted to say thanks for all the advice you have given me and others through the years. God knows I've needed it. I too was married 25 years. (Technically 26 by the time the divorce was final.) I hung on for a very long time before getting my act together. Too long. If there was any advice I could give a newbie, it would be to do the work, move on, and live your life as if the EX isn't coming back. Don't waste time. Life is too short.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.


Tad

Last edited by tadpole1025; 11/24/22 02:48 AM.

Currently:
M 55 XW 56
Sons 36,32,30,27

The Sitch:
Married 26 years
EA w/ OM 9/10
Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary)
Sep 12/10
She wants D 1/11
W files 5/11
D final 10/11
XW marries OM 6/13
3 members like this: job, AndrewP, bttrfly
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always good to see you Tad! Happy thanksgiving!


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"There's something awfully screwy going on around here!"

Walk along the side of the road with a bag & you're gonna end up with a lot of trash!
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,310
Likes: 8
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Thanks bttrfly. I hope you had a great day.

Tad


Currently:
M 55 XW 56
Sons 36,32,30,27

The Sitch:
Married 26 years
EA w/ OM 9/10
Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary)
Sep 12/10
She wants D 1/11
W files 5/11
D final 10/11
XW marries OM 6/13
1 member likes this: bttrfly
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,156
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job Offline OP
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Tad,

I do understand how you feel about the holidays and your former spouse tending to make them special. However, once they walk away from all that is good, we are left picking up the pieces of our lives. Sometimes things have to be broken to bits in order to put them back together again, i.e., as new purpose, new people. For example, when we have hurricanes, tornadoes and other disasters that ruin a home, a county, a state, people tend to build back better the next time around. That's what we need to do...build back our own lives, think about the people we were before we met our spouses and try to find deep down in our inner selves, who we want to be. This is our opportunity to rediscover ourselves and learn to smile and make new traditions.

You have grown so much over the years. You have a wonderful grandson and two beautiful little "girls" since joining the forum. Those four legged divas have brought you so much joy and companionship since you adopted them. You wouldn't have thought of adopting them had you not healed enough to open your heart. Tad, do not be afraid to start new traditions, find things that you have never done before and just go with it.

Miracles do happen this time of year. I'll be watching for updates on your adventures and the divas' adventures this holiday season.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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Thank you Job. I agree about being the person you were before meeting your spouse. I'm having a hard time with that. I was 17 when we met. So long ago, but I'm still digging to find that person.

You're right. I have a wonderful grandson and two furry little divas. As for the divas, they would have never entered my life if things went any differently. I am thankful to have them. They bring me joy every single day.

Take care.

Tad

Last edited by tadpole1025; 12/01/22 02:01 AM.

Currently:
M 55 XW 56
Sons 36,32,30,27

The Sitch:
Married 26 years
EA w/ OM 9/10
Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary)
Sep 12/10
She wants D 1/11
W files 5/11
D final 10/11
XW marries OM 6/13
1 member likes this: job
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