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AndrewP Offline OP
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Originally Posted by dream
Enjoy each day that we're given. ♥
It's like those cheesy signs say ... Today is a Present.

Originally Posted by dream
How was brunch with your son last week?
It was nice. Lots of engaging conversation and the time flew by. I just need to steer him away from provincial politics and it's all good smile It's nice to see as time goes on that some of the generalized anger and depression that he seemed to have had back in the day seems to be absent. Other than provincial politics of course.

Hard to believe that in a couple of weeks that it will be Thanksgiving. I have to check to see if he'll be available for dinner. I already have a duck set aside.

I hope you and the boys are continuing to do well.


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Those cheesy signs/sayings are pretty accurate!! blush

Glad you had a good visit with your son. All is well here. Settling into a routine now that school is back in session. My oldest is 16 and now driving... shocked crazy I try not to get too anxious about it. Not many years left of interactions with XH.

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Originally Posted by kml
All WASs seem to feel like they got shafted in the divorce settlement - because in their imaginations, they were going to have the zipless divorce, get all the assets, and live happily ever after. And when the reality of a fair divorce settlement hits, well, it must be SOMEONE's fault, so must be yours, right?

I think this is far more prevalent than we realise. The WAS' already want to blame us for their unhappiness, fairly or not. Judging by little snippets I've heard, I am pretty sure my XH also tells himself, and the kids, that I took him to the cleaners - even though that is patently untrue. I don't know for sure what the kids think about it though - they never, ever mention him to me at all. Ever.

Andrew, if your XW has split up with OM, I for one would not judge you one iota for smirking. I certainly would wink Yeah - I'm evil. I'm just gonna have to live with that grin


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Originally Posted by devvo
Andrew, if your XW has split up with OM, I for one would not judge you one iota for smirking. I certainly would wink Yeah - I'm evil. I'm just gonna have to live with that grin
Last time I drove past their house on my way home from the shops both vehicles were there. Given that it was a rumour that was passed to me, there's no way of knowing what the actual truth is and since it doesn't affect me or the kids, I don't care. Although yes - some quiet smirking can be called for.

I expect that in 18 months when the money stops flowing in from me that it will make things rather more uncomfortable. I have a number of friends who have signed up to help me celebrate that freedom from feedom.

I used to worry that she'd try to circle back in some fashion after the money dries up but am not any more. As the philosopher Randy Travis once wrote "Now you're just an old song nobody sings anymore"


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Originally Posted by AndrewP
I used to worry that she'd try to circle back in some fashion after the money dries up but am not any more.
Why would you worry about that? Are you worried you would take her back? Hurt her feelings?

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Originally Posted by AndrewP
Originally Posted by devvo
Andrew, if your XW has split up with OM, I for one would not judge you one iota for smirking. I certainly would wink Yeah - I'm evil. I'm just gonna have to live with that grin
Last time I drove past their house on my way home from the shops both vehicles were there. Given that it was a rumour that was passed to me, there's no way of knowing what the actual truth is and since it doesn't affect me or the kids, I don't care. Although yes - some quiet smirking can be called for.

I expect that in 18 months when the money stops flowing in from me that it will make things rather more uncomfortable. I have a number of friends who have signed up to help me celebrate that freedom from feedom.

I used to worry that she'd try to circle back in some fashion after the money dries up but am not any more. As the philosopher Randy Travis once wrote "Now you're just an old song nobody sings anymore"

Great song and appropriate for the topic. This is why I love you, Andrew! RT is a philosopher indeed.


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Up to 5 dead as of last Friday. Just seems to be a thing lately.

- one acquaintance suicide
- one heart attack of a friend of a friend
- elderly next door neighbour found on kitchen floor
- son of my boss via overdose
- one of my uncles of a genetic disease that caught up to him

Hope that's the last of them for a while.

Was bumped into by my xW I think on Friday. I was at a craft show and she - or at least someone who looks identical to her (it's been more than a few years) came in through a side aisle, ricocheted off me, looked up and then rapidly took off down another aisle never to be seen again. I was wearing a mask because of the combination of flu season and being in a crowded venue but was undoubtedly still recognizable.

Can't admit to being really surprised. She did like craft shows as do I. I got a new tea cozy. It's very nice. I also got some small cups that I'm going to try later with espresso from my moka-pot along with some lovely hand-made Christmas decor.

I have no interest in interacting with my xW - the last time was 5 years ago at the divorce negotiations where she was just a bundle of fury. Any time our paths cross (small towns - she lives 10 minutes away) she immediately and vigorously changes location. I find it rather humourous. It only happens a couple of times a year fortunately. I'm rather predictable in my routines and easily avoided I'm sure.

Happy Sunday all! Made peanut butter cookies yesterday using a variation on my usual recipe. Rather pleased with the results. This morning tried using a meringue in my pancakes instead of just mixing in the egg - mixed results (no pun intended).

Trying to decide on dinner for tonight. I have a nice pork cottage roll out but I also have some peppers that maybe should be eaten up. Might put it all into the crock-pot and hope for the best. Ah - the hedonistic lifestyle of the vacationing middle-aged bachelor. I'm considering getting back into dating if for no other reason than to have someone who would appreciate my cooking especially at breakfast crazy Need to be careful with that though. The last time I ended up having to feed nearly 10 people every Sunday night which was exhausting.

Back to the plant tomorrow after a week and half off.

PS - cat is doing well and really likes that I put a cat bed on my desk.


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Good Morning Andrew

Yes, as we get to be our age more and more folk we know pass on. Of course, we notice it more than when we were younger and invincible.

Congrats on the peanut butter cookies and meringue pancakes smile . And tonight’s supper plans sounds delicious. Middle-aged bachelor. Hee. Small town life affords no skip the dishes or some such. Good thing too, elsewise I’d most likely be utilizing it daily. Haha.

If you get back to dating, I hope it’s dinner for two for a good long while. Feeding a brood of ten is for special events and celebrations.

Enjoy the day, and I hope not too many things piled up at the plant after your week and a half absence.

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You’ve waited a good long time since the last fiasco to start dating again. I think you’re ready BUT before your brain gets all fogged up with oxytocin, how about setting a few ground tiles for yourself?

No living together for AT LEAST the first year.

No proposing for at least one year.

Be very wary of damsels in distress.

And given your history, best make sure they are legally divorced and unentangled.

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Originally Posted by AndrewP
Up to 5 dead as of last Friday. Just seems to be a thing lately.

- one acquaintance suicide
- one heart attack of a friend of a friend
- elderly next door neighbour found on kitchen floor
- son of my boss via overdose
- one of my uncles of a genetic disease that caught up to him

Hope that's the last of them for a while.

I should probably put this on my own thread but since I rarely post there I’ll just say you are not alone and if I choose to and get the inclination to follow through I’ll put the details there. But you’re not alone. Probably won’t make it any better or easier but in good company.

- 25 plus year friend, 63, very rare brain tumor
- Wild girl (dated) 46, recently learned death certificate lists possible complications of chronic alcohol (or something to that effect) left behind daughters now 19 and 21
- colleague recruited me to new start up during Covid, 57, never married, long resume, challenging to work with/for, not at all what met them eyes- even before her suicide
- drummer/good friend I’ve known since my teens, 68 sudden cardiac arrest
- two more with devastating diagnosis, the clock is ticking

I keep saying - ENOUGH ALREADY.

I still feel as I long have. No aches or pains, great shape, great genes including grandparents living to mid 90s, uncle 89 and counting living as if he were 70 or 75. But my friends are slowing down. Life has changed. The world has changed.

Sorry for your losses Andrew


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