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Josh71 Offline OP
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Originally Posted by Ready2Change
The old timers here talked about "putting on your rain coat" and let the emotions from the spouse fly. I was ready for my X to do this, but she never did. She was already checked out. Put your raincoat on. Set boundaries when she is disrespectful.
I love it. That's it!

Originally Posted by kml
Just trying to hold up a mirror of what "normal" behavior would look like.
Um, that's a good reminder. I've had this anger directed at me so long, I forget what normal looks like. I even recall a few years ago, thinking about why couldn't this sort of reaction be the norm? It would be nice if she were kinder in her complaints.

ATM, she's not taking responsibility for me communicating my weekly schedule (claiming she doesn't have time to read sms, then demands a weekly email on Friday), continues to attempt to break boundaries (talking about finances in person instead of email), and complains about not having enough time to herself (she isn't asking for it, that was my agreement with her, I'm not offering).

In any event, this isn't about STBXW. It's about me. I'm going to my 3rd L today and will make a decision. We're also investigating two mediators and will make a decision. I've also decided that once we have an agreed parenting plan I reserve the option for a quick exit if things get too uncomfortable. Two L's have said to me it isn't a problem other than STBXW might demand a settlement adjustment for the rent I pay. Which is a small price to pay for mental health.

One thing I really appreciate about my sitch is to find out where your friends stand. The friend that I thought was emotionally supportive is not so, and another friend, who I didn't really put enough effort to connect, has become the most supported and trusted friend in my life.


Me: 47 w/ S10, D12, D3
Current T: 12; M: 11 years; BD1: 11-11-18; BD2: 22-04-22; STBXW: 41
Previous M: 4 years; Big D: 2004; XW: 48
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 274
Likes: 11
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Josh71 Offline OP
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OP Offline
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Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 274
Likes: 11


Me: 47 w/ S10, D12, D3
Current T: 12; M: 11 years; BD1: 11-11-18; BD2: 22-04-22; STBXW: 41
Previous M: 4 years; Big D: 2004; XW: 48
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