5 weeks until pre-trial

[kml]

It's not so much about how you look to your ex, as how you look to the judge. You want to look competent, put together - nothing at all like whatever ex wants to paint you as. Nothing like a hysterical woman or a depressed one. Business casual sounds like the right look - good fitting slacks and a sweater would be fine. (And if ex looks at you and thinks he's missing out, that's just a bonus).

[kas99]

I've got pants that fit but my sweaters are boxy. I was a homemaker for 15 years and he left right after I got a new job so I never got a chance to shop. I don't look put together I look poor because other than my pants and my sensible shoes everything I own is thrifted. Everyone I work with is poor too so I fit right in. I haven't been in a real store in over 2 years.

[kml]

You can get nice clothes at the thrift store! If you have some nice pants, just either pick your best sweater OR go buy a $3 top at the thrift store that fits OR borrow something from a friend. Just something that looks reasonably put together and fits, not sloppy.

[kas99]

I don't mind being poor and my definition of poor is living paycheck to paycheck with nothing to cut back on other than food. I'm happier now that I'm not having to live beyond my means for him. I saved a bunch of money back before I moved and I got stimulus money. Somehow the universe has made it all work out. I no longer worry about money and my thrifted clothes are nice just a bit big.

[kas99]

You can get nice clothes at the thrift store! If you have some nice pants, just either pick your best sweater OR go buy a $3 top at the thrift store that fits OR borrow something from a friend. Just something that looks reasonably put together and fits, not sloppy.

That's why I was asking what to wear. I may leave early from work and go thrift a blazer or something that fits. You'll laugh but there is a nice thrift store close to my work that is 50% off on Wednesday for seniors. They carded me when I asked for the discount. lol

[bttrfly]

Consignment stores have amazing bargains! Some great finds often with the tag still on. It's worth a cruise through a couple.

They usually also have awesome deals on accessories.

It's the same as thrift store prices but might be a slightly better quality.

Boxy is ok. Pulls or pilling, not so much.

Hope this helps.

PS And heck yeah, so grateful not to have to live up to the excessive spending of my exh!!!

[kas99]

Bttrfly,

D19 has a gift for fashion and can put together these amazing outfits from thrift stores. I got her to help me and she put together a killer outfit for $8. I feel self conscious because it um fits. A while back I bought some expensive heels at an estate sale but I’ve never worn them. I just couldn’t pass up getting a pair of $120 shoes for $6.

See I can live well on very little. Stbxh is back in debt because he can’t stop spending.

3 hours until court. Music blasting while I try to find my inner strength.

[BL42]

kas99 - Good luck in court. Hope it goes well for you. Keep us posted.

[Traveler]

Good luck, Kas! Be your best self in court today.

[kml]

Play Tom Petty You Got Lucky!