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Joined: Feb 2017
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L
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You know the funny part.

If you told her to get her lazy a$$ out of bed and the kids online for school or she would hear from your lawyer, she would for once respect the $hit out of you.

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J
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What a disaster.

You’re a father regardless if she has them. How do you not get that? Screw her if it makes her mad if you make sure they’re taken care of.

You spend more time and effort into winning a woman (and I use that term loosely because it’s an insult to woman) back who doesn’t care about you or your children than you being a dad. It’s disgusting.

You come off like it’s more important to be the victim and everyone thinks she’s a horrible person than literally anything else.

Seriously, I’ll let other handle this. I can understand not being able to heal and move on from your ex. But I don’t understand the flat out admission you won’t be a full time father.


Me: 40
EX:37
Together 17 years
Married 16 years
5 kids, 20,18,15,14,11

BD 03/06/20, divorced 12/23/21
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 511
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Steve_ Offline OP
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Okay clearly there is no reasoning with yalll its extreme everything here. I just told you I called and asked about the kids today, I asked if they are in school, I have talked to the teacher and the school but they are not enforcing it. I called WW I told her that its not okay for them to be skipping.. all I can do is take care of them on my days, (which I do!)

Yall act like I just sit back to please everything she does. I took a step in the right direction actually trying to GAL and yall call it games... then I call her to talk about the kids and she is rude as hell out of nowhere so yall reach to something about an OM.

So I guess ill never be able to comment how GAL works since its playing games with her to post up a picture with my friends, I post pictures of me and the kids doing awesome stuff all the time. Is that not what GAL is supposed to be about? Also If the teacher, and school is not interested in the kids attendance enough to take action what can I or the L do? the attendance office calls her and she makes up excuses. Im over this dude. Its like you guys just read this to immidiately 2x4. No wonder this has slowed down so much. When I actually have sufficient evidence to do something that wont be a waste of time and $ in court I will. But this state will not even take children away from known drug users as long as there is not abuse so yeah missing 12-13 days of online school isnt going to do it. But hey you guys are the experts here. Please go ahead and tell me how not putting them into online school is neglect, tell me how to prove that when tons of kids are not compliant with online school. A judge is not going to to jack squat about it, especially since the schools are going to open up to in class sessions soon and she will have to take them. Let me start a big expensive fight about it now? for what? I get that you guys are used to seeing things a certain way but damn..


T:11
M:10
K: D5, S7
BD: 9/1/20
WW continues to break up and recon with OM.
I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021
Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21.
Glad my D was not busted.
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Steve,

You’re in easy read for us. If you truly were GAL you wouldn’t have to post in online. You are very manipulative as is your STBXW.

I think you’ve been asked this before. What do you want from the board?

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1) GAL does not require posting pictures. The old nurse saying “ if it isn’t charted, it isn’t done” does not apply to GAL. It still happened without rubbing it all over SM

2) how in gods green earth can she even see your posts? How is she not blocked?

3) we can see right through your attempts at getting a reaction to her. You even mentioned how “the $100 bottle of wine was in the picture “. We were not born yesterday .

4) I agree 100% with LH. You and your wife are 2 very manipulative people.

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Keep making excuses. You’re the one who’s gonna face the consequences to your behavior. Good luck with that


Me: 40
EX:37
Together 17 years
Married 16 years
5 kids, 20,18,15,14,11

BD 03/06/20, divorced 12/23/21
Joined: Nov 2019
Posts: 141
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Steve - it's your kids who are the victim of this situation, not you.

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Steve_ Offline OP
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Lmao the wine was not In the picture just me and my coworkers here we go adding stuff. C’mon y’all like fine posting a picture of me hanging out and having a life showing I’m having fun is apparently manipulation. Okay, lol. Now I’m a bad father cause I do t make the court enforce a rule the school don’t enforce. This is too much man I get the frustration but it’s not like I share this stuff to piss you off I do it to make sure I’m not going to far. I have made many good steps but the judgment in here is getting extra lol. I’m gonna take a break and stop even thinking about anything for a couple weeks and get a fresh crack at this. I’m Overloaded


T:11
M:10
K: D5, S7
BD: 9/1/20
WW continues to break up and recon with OM.
I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021
Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21.
Glad my D was not busted.
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,822
Likes: 226
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Steve, I understand you feel judged, maybe too harshly. But the posters here have no incentive to be overly critical. I don't think anyone is purposely trying to attack you. I know you've endured a lot of 2x4s. And sometimes it feels "extra". But people here just want to see you move forward. Instead of continuing to be stuck.

I wish you would go back and read mbr's post. He can relate more than most. His WW was the only one I can remember since I've been on the forum worse than yours. But yours is a close second. I'd love for you to learn from his wisdom instead of making the same mistakes.

Steve, we've had a several posters feel attacked and judged that came back later to say they wish they'd listened to everyone. I'm hoping you won't leave the board and if you do I hope it's temporary. I foresee a lot of pain in your future, when another OM comes along and she ends up remarrying. I'm afraid you haven't done the hard work to move yourself to a place where you'll be able to emotionally handle that eventuality. Your kids need you to be their rock because your WW certainly doesn't have it in her to be that. My prayer for you is to move forward and move on from her toxicity. And I hope you will seriously consider getting the emotional and mental help you desperately need.

God speed and I pray for better days and great blessings for you!


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 511
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Steve_ Offline OP
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I’m not gonna quit I’m just overloaded. I guess I thought I was doing the right thing I honestly am not trying to manipulate I know she don’t give a F about me I was just enjoying myself and was finally not scared to be open with it. I was taken aback by how she claimed to not care but got mad.. that’s all. I was feeling ready to hang out with whoever. I did not expect her to actually be mad about it. I actually figured she would be like oh okay he’s moving on fine I don’t gotta feel bad now.. thought it would push things along even. It’s not about getting my W back I was about having fun and sticking up for myself. That’s all. I’m just a bit raw about the attacks on me being a dad. I do so much for these kids more than most dads go Lengths to do. But I cannot control mom, I ask her to be responsible I ask her to do the right thing. But I refuse to not watch them when she goes out or not pick up homework for them cause she don’t want to do it. Sure it’s not a good move as a lbs but it’s about being a dad not about my WW. Honestly I’m watching them right now, it’s not even about being a good H it’s about having zero issue spending all the time I can with them because I won’t get to do it later. I never take days off from being a dad, I never let my kids get watched by someone else, never ask my WW to do anything for me to help as a parent. I just ask her to do a better job and she’s not into being a W or a M right now, she is into being crazy. I’m not trying to whine here but I did get some 2x4’s that were unnecessary. I am not playing games I’m trying desperately to move on. But what I took away from all this today is that I cannot rush moving on and just like “hey I’m okay now” I want to be. But I’m not that’s fine I guess. I’m just so exhausted from all this crap being an LBS/only responsible parent this is doing. But I will eat my lemons and just relax. I will still do a lot with all my friends but if what I did comes off as manipulation I will not post up stuff of girls that are friends just me and my male buddies out fishing, hiking, camping and what not. Guess I tried to do too much to fast. Cant cheat the process of this I suppose. I’m not mad about it but I just care too much, had a F it kind of day and was not ashamed until I read y’all’s responses. It’s fine though I’ll do better next time. I haven’t ever been left by a wife before and a single dad on my own before gonna need to get the hang of dealing with it.


T:11
M:10
K: D5, S7
BD: 9/1/20
WW continues to break up and recon with OM.
I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021
Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21.
Glad my D was not busted.
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