You need to make an appointment w/a therapist to help you navigate the next few months because of the holidays. Try to remember, that the more you chase after her, the more she's going to run from you. She knows that you still love her, but right now, she's out there exploring and who knows if this guy will be a permanent fixture in her life or she'll move on to someone else...whatever she's doing...you have absolutely no control over her or what she does.
I want you to make a list of things that you've not done in a long time and start working on that list. You've got to find a way to keep yourself busy. Put a rubber band on your wrist and each time you think of her, snap that bad boy. This is the time for you to work on yourself and figure out what you want to do w/your life, if your wife doesn't return. Holidays are difficult...spend them w/a friend and/or family...but do not be alone at this time.
Last edited by job; 11/24/2011:05 PM. Reason: added link to new thread
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.