Yay!!! I mean, it seems like a weird thing to celebrate, but in my case, by the time it finally got done, I wanted to throw a party. And in your case, I think the realization of how disturbed and toxic your ex really is, probably makes this a relief for you as well.
Secondly, I had a couple thoughts on what you wrote below:
Originally Posted by scout12
He also wanted to confirm the Christmas Day agreement "as discussed". This is part of the new parenting plan and so far I've pushed back on implementing anything in the new plan until he signs it. On his part, he's tried to circumvent this by implementing things that have not yet been legally enshrined. I think that's a VERY slippery slope. That's not how this works. It's not how any of this works!
My X does this too (pointing to arbitrary conversations in the past), and it is annoying.
We actually have legally enforceable signed documents, but she will point to things "as discussed" from a year ago that are different from our (more recent) documents. And even then she is often twisting what we supposedly "agreed" upon. It's verrrrrrrry slippery as you say. I chalk it up to a person grabbing any evidence they can to justify their position, ignoring what doesn't fit, picking what does.
I used to spend a lot of time wondering -- is my X truly calculating and diabolical, or do people with unhealthy coping strategies just default to these distortions of reality and not even realize what they are doing? Same goes for other toxic people.
I don't really care anymore though... my guess is most of them are just unhealthy and not pure evil.
I think you are doing the right thing, keeping your guard up. I like to think that my trust can be earned, but I'm not going to grant it freely.
It was pretty straightforward. My L and I sat in her office and she conference called into the court. There were several other divorce hearings before mine. The registrar asked if both parties had representation. I did, X didn’t turn up at all. My L confirmed that we were proceeding with the application and that nothing had changed with regards to custody. The registrar said he was satisfied and granted the divorce. Badabing, badaboom.
S2 woke up vomiting at 5am this morning. There was a gastro outbreak at his daycare last week so I guess he finally succumbed. So we are chilling at home watching old school Disney movies today. He’s currently sucking on ice cubes every ten minutes and I’ll give him some vegemite toast and hydralite soon.
Today was supposed to be my last day of work before two weeks’ holiday. I was planning to go into the office because our chefs are making a big Christmas feast. Check out the menu! Pretty bummed to be missing out, but gotta take care of the little man.
Bourbon and Pineapple Glazed ham Cranberry and Hazelnut Stuffed Turkey Breast BBQ Bugs with Burnt butter and lime Char-grilled white Peach, Haloumi & mint salad Duck fat potatoes Grilled Asparagus, Water cress, Parmesan and truffle Pavlova, Mascarpone, Honeycomb, fresh figs and Persian fairy floss
Congrats, Scout! And that menu looks amazing... but I need a LITTLE Aussie English translation. Are bugs lobsters? And fairy floss is cotton candy, right? maybe someone can drop by with a plate!!
Poor S2, that is no fun. Although getting to watch movies all day when sick has always been an enormous silver lining for my kids. Hopefully he can keep everything down and you guys can enjoy some old school Disney together!
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
Oh my, that menu! Can't you get someone to bring you a plate?
Sorry about the little guy - I can't count how many times I caught the stomach flu from my kids when they were little. Make sure you're stocked up on stuff for yourself in case you catch it.
