I think I do. I think maybe she still sees that I’m available as an option although I’ve tried to curve that as much as possible.
Do you have any advice on where to go from here based on my recent update?
Thanks again for stopping in sandi, it is always appreciated.I re read all of your posts related to the WW yesterday and it helped a lot.
I need some help from the board.
I’m in school right now and I work full time. I have decided to rehome my dog with a family member of mine because they work from home, they own land and they have always loved my dog. I simply don’t have time anymore without the help from my wife. Between work and school I’m gone from 6AM to 11:00 PM.
I have made it work the past few months by coming home multiple times during the day but I can’t keep up and it’s not fair for him to be home alone this long by himself.
The family member is out of state so I will be driving him this weekend. They already told me I can come get him whenever I want if anything ever changes. They’ve seen me with him and they know how much I love him.
My question is before I take him do I let my wife know to offer her a chance to see him before he’s gone?
Not asking for her input on the decision. The decision is mine and it is made. I’m simply asking should I give her a chance to say bye to him?
This is your NGS creepy in on you. You absolutely can’t nice her back. If she ever asks about the dog you can tell her what happened.
The point Sandi is is trying to make w/o telling you what to do is to remove yourself as an option. I understand you believe you are as you put it “curving in that direction”. Your W knows she can have you at the drop of a hat.
I want you to peek in on Steve’s thread. Not Steve85. His W has left him 5 times for other men. Do you want to risk something like that in the future when you have kids?
Thanks you guys. I was leaning in that direction anyways. No it is.
LH,
I hear you and I know you’re right. I stay up to date on his thread and No I definitely do not want to experience that. I think my wife does still think she could have me back at the drop off a hat but It’s actually not the case anymore.
There would be a lot of things that would need to be happen. Things I don’t think wife would do. That’s why as I said earlier I’ve pretty much accepted the whole situation for what it is.
I think every person on this board has dreamed about the WW coming back on their hands and needs begging for forgiveness. Saying they will do whatever it takes to make it up to us.
Funny how in almost 6 years of me being here I’ve never seen it happen once.
Sometimes I think this board hampers people’s expectations. They read about the fog and believe nothing they say and they think they will eventually snap out of it. When truthfully that rarely happens. If it does it’s many years down the road. Even if they do it’s hard to admit they were wrong and face all the people they hurt. I think it’s easier for them to just move on.
Anyways the lesson to be learned here is to know your value and to never again let someone treat you this way.
You’ve given me a lot of great advice since the beginning.
I agree that with the whole WW coming back begging and pleading. In my opinion there is 0% chance of that happening in the situations on here.
I think you’re timeline is accurate if something is going to change it will be years down the road. I would say 6 months minimum and that’s depending on what the relationship was like pre BD and if you drop the rope as soon as you get the bomb. Which I don’t think many people can do. Including myself.
Haha “the fog” Ya I’m not sure how much I’m buying that one anymore.
I agree the lesson here is to know my value and act accordingly.
Yeah I think no, I know your doing things a lot better than I am. The only thing I’ve done right so far is validate and not beg her back. But boy have I made it wayyyyy to clear I want another shot. Today she said she has to go to the gym and so some other stuff she said “I know it’s my day with the kids is that okay” I just said, do what you gotta do, I’m at home with the kids it’s fine. She goes on and says “I’ll send you a pic at the gym” I said “it’s fine I don’t care, it doesn’t matter what you do anymore” she rolled her eyes at that. A pretty clear indication she believes my detachment 0%. I guess I’ll just have to keep proving to her that I really don’t care. Even if she is telling me one thing there is always some lies or at least half truths in it and I’m glad I’m able to see it now.
Last edited by Steve_; 10/29/2002:28 AM.
T:11 M:10 K: D5, S7 BD: 9/1/20 WW continues to break up and recon with OM. I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021 Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21. Glad my D was not busted.
