isn't it interesting to find out the crazy things the ex's are doing? I'm sure mine had a field day when he learned about the chicks living in their brooder in the downstairs bath. I, in turn, think some of his escapades are equally bizarre. grateful doesn't even begin to describe how I feel to be away from it all. Sure you feel the same Kml. xo
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
I sure do! It's interesting though how my kids don't seem to think it's weird at all. Just goes to show how his behavior was "normalized" in their childhood and/or how he's so good at making such things SOUND reasonable. My middle child (whose cat it was before he went off to college) DID express a wish that she was on a leash but feels he has so much else to worry about right now (job turmoil) that he can't think about that.
My XH, who didn’t want any animals, has two dogs, a fish (our daughter’s) and ELEVEN chickens!!! I always thought he was joking about the chickens...lol.
Andrew... the second I read your post, I knew it was Monty Python...and I wasn’t that big of a fan. Probably only saw the Holy Grail and that was 34 years ago!!! Not sure that scene was from the Holy Grail but if it wasn’t, maybe I’ve seen two MP movies???
Let’s hope 2021 is a better year. Seriously...how can it get any worse? (And yes... I did knock on some wood after I wrote that.)
My ex was very much a "critter person". It was her that was keen on having cats - she had one and a box full of kittens when we met. I was a "keeper" it seemed when the kittens peed on me and I didn't freak out.
Cats were a big part of her identity (and also related to the pet name I called her). Cat themed decorating was and still is all over the house. We always had at least two and sometimes 3 cats. After a failed experiment with a lab cross dog (nobody looked after it and it terrorized the kids as a bouncy puppy) she did get a rescued Pomeranian that required less care. I had said that I was ok with a new family dog if it was small, short haired, non-barky and that I wouldn't have to do any of the pet care. Well - he was small.
I always did the bulk of the pet care, feeding and cleaning up after them, taking them to the vet etc including for the dog. The dog never got walked but never really had a lot of interest in walking. He liked laying in the sunshine and barking at people walking by.
Anyhoodles - I clearly remember her screaming at the pets after D-Day during in house separation that she never wanted to have any pets ever ever again and that after these were gone that we weren't getting any more. She threatened on more than one occasion (screaming) to kill them all. Mind you, she did that to the kids too. Ah - good times ... . I actually posted a thread on here about the LBP (left behind pets) - her puir wee dog really suffered with the stress and separation anxiety.
She did end up taking the dog with her and OM had a full sized poodle that used to be his deceased wife's from what I understand. Not sure what her opinion is about pets these days. Last I heard, her dog - who never got walked - is fatter, older and ill as of a couple of years ago. I would be surprised if he's still around. Nice dog - I didn't really care for him but we got along fine.
Sad.
Perhaps it's part of the package rejection of their past lives. I know that for DnJ that their dogs were a big part of his wife's life and she walked away from those without looking back.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
I was raised on a farm, so I've always been an animal lover, though I prefer dogs to cats, but that is just a personal thing. XH and I got a dog when he went through his health issues so that he had "someone" at home with him while I was working and the girls were at school. I was never a huge fan of small, inside dogs, but we lived on a very busy road with no fence so the dog we got was inside and man did we both LOVE her. When we D'ed the dog (Molly) was one of the very few things we actually fought about. In the end, I got her, much to his sadness, but he moved on with his OW who is a cat person so now he has cats, according to the girls. I still have Molly, plus Sparky's 2 big outside dogs and we are going to get a kitten soon because Sparky is more a cat person than a dog person. Molly is old and when it is her time to go, I will be devastated because I have had her since she was 6 months old, but I won't have another inside dog. Sparky's outside dogs are relatively young still, one just barely out of puppyhood and the other around 5. Sigh...…………………………………………..
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
My ex and I usually had a cat, and got a German Shepherd when the kids were old enough. When we separated, I kept the dog (who was old and blind and crippled by that time and died after a year) and my ex kept the cat, which had been my middle son's (kitten we got him as therapy when he had anorexia/bulimia). Middle son was gone to college and never did live in a place where he could take this cat, as she was used to going indoors and outdoors and son lived in cities where a cat would have to be indoors only to be safe. So ex has had this cat for the last 11 years.
I didn't get any new pets when I moved into my new house but my youngest son has a dog which we adopted as a puppy to help my son's depression (he's been a lifesaver and is the best little dog ever) and my oldest son who also lives with me has a black cat. I get enough pet time without the responsibility which is ok by me for now. Maybe when I retire I'll think about getting a dog.
Funny story - I was giving away my old vibraphone (which needs repair to be usable, not really sale able - it’s a project). I posted it on Craigslist and the first response was from a guy a couple of hours away. I give him the address and my first name and he responds “are you (first name last name)? (Youngest son)’s mom?“
Lol it was a good friend of my son’s. I hadn’t even thought to ask my son if any of his friends might want it. Serendipity!
So got rid of that and one other bulky item brought home from the storage unit, so the project of emptying it out and storing things in the garage is done. (CMM does have some boxes still to sort through and get rid of but it’s weaned down to a reasonable amount that fits in my garage). Since I’m opposed to the general idea of storage units it’s a relief to be free of it.
Spent the evening watching an old disaster flick (Volcano) and using my seam ripper to take out a waistband on a skirt. It’s an old favorite of my business partner’s but the elastic is worn out. I offered to replace it for her, it requires remaking the waistband but it’s a pretty easy project for me. I know what it’s like to have a favorite piece of clothing that just works for you, that’s how she feels about this skirt. I know many seamstresses hate ripping seams, but I find it kind of peaceful and meditative.
More things to tick off my to do list tomorrow . It feels never-ending. But you eat an elephant one bite at a time.
Cemo day today, catching up on office work while he gets his infusion. Plans to putter around the house this weekend while he recovers. Big excitement! Taking movie recommendations. (I've already seen all of the Queen's Gambit and the Chicago 7 movie, both excellent).
. I actually posted a thread on here about the LBP (left behind pets) - her puir wee dog really suffered with the stress and separation anxiety.