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Wolfman Offline OP
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Hey everyone. It’s been a while. So much has happened in my life. Let me tell you what a ride it’s been the last 2 months. Let’s say, I have been standing up to my ex and it’s been so difficult. She has made life so hard. Let me tell you guys a little. At the end of March with this whole pandemic I had to work from home like everyone else, so I needed my computer it was at her house. I let it stay there because she claimed she needed to get her “stuff” off the computer 2 months earlier. So, one Monday morning at the end of March I text my ex that I wanted my computer back and that I would pick it up when I get the kids. She text me I can’t have it, I can get it on Friday, told her that was unacceptable. I am going to abbreviate a lot of this. We went back and forth and finally she said she would drop it off at my house. That evening. She text me she was going to leave my computer at the curb. Again I told her that was unacceptable to put it on my porch. She can stomping up to my front door, banged on it very aggressively. When I opened the door I asked her to hand it to me and I had some documents to give her. She said where are my documents. I said just put the computer down and I will get the documents. She dropped the computer and broke it. I didn’t know that at the moment. I went and got her documents, they were in a folder so I threw it on the lawn. She was so offended that she lunges to take the computer back, I stepped in front of her and grabbed the computer and ran into my house. She flung the screen door open breaking it off the hinge and tried to force herself into my home. My GF had to push back on the main door and lock her out. She continued standing on my porch cursing and yelling. I had to wait for her to go back to her car and then I let my son out of the house. My D unfortunately saw all of that. Well the next day I was served with a refrain from order. She claims I grabbed her and threw her back. So the next day I got one against her. Well now she can’t go back on her lie, so now we pick up and drop off our kids at the police station. If she just would have given me my computer to begin with, but she tried to control me and the minute I stand up to her she gets crazy. At this point the ex and I barely communicate which is nice, less drama.

I am currently living with my GF. My son is great with her but my D hates me and my GF. It’s been so hard with my D. She basically she does not want a father, I’m not kidding about this. My ex is dating and the BF is always over there. I got a hold of my D cell phone and went through it. She had a conversation to her mom about him being there all the time and shoving him down their throats. She has only been dating this guy 3 months and has him over all the time.But to protect her mom she will tell me she likes him and he is funny and nice. She could have brought home a bum on the street and she would have loved him. My GF is so good to my kids, she constantly goes out of her way to give my kids what they want. I just miss my little girl. Everything is just a mess, I feel horrible that my kids are going through this. Hey here have been so many other things but I will talk about another day. It’s great to be back.


M:42 XW:41
T:19 M: 15
D:13 S:10
BD: 8/10/18
Moved out: 8/18
Moved in: 9/18/18
Moved out: 4/22/19
D papers signed 11/4/19
D final 3/18/20
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W,

I’m rally sorry your kids have to grow through this and hope they are getting the help they need. My friends parents aced like you two when they got D and he’s still in therapy. You guys are definitely immature and put both put your needs ahead of your children. It’s very sad that with all that is going on in the world they have this to absorb too.

Wolf you can’t control how your Ex acts but you at least have to do your part and do the right thing.

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Wolfman Offline OP
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Originally Posted by LH19
W,

I’m rally sorry your kids have to grow through this and hope they are getting the help they need. My friends parents aced like you two when they got D and he’s still in therapy. You guys are definitely immature and put both put your needs ahead of your children. It’s very sad that with all that is going on in the world they have this to absorb too.

Wolf you can’t control how your Ex acts but you at least have to do your part and do the right thing.


LH you are so right. I am trying hard to make things right with the kids but also not let her take advantage of me. That whole incident should have never happened. Even divorced she is STILL trying to control me. I don’t let that happen anymore and these are the things she does. Granted I shouldn’t have thrown the folder but I am just so fed up with her. She broke my computer and erased over 200 pictures of my kids on the computer. For what reason??? Just to be spiteful. And she subjects the kids to the police station. Why? Because when she longed for the computer and stepped in front of her and basically boxed her out. LH from the beginning you always said to me to take my b@lls back. I knew anytime I would stand up to her there would be h3ll to pay. That is exactly what is happening. I am taking my b@lls back and she isn’t use to it and throwing these crazy fits. In the last 2 months there has been so much that has gone on. I will share little by little.
My GF has been a champ in all of this. Surprisingly none of this has scared her away. She has also helped me stand up to the ex. Sometimes when I am going to just play nice with the ex so there isn’t this drama, she reminds me that’s not my job to appease her. That I have to do what’s right. So I do what’s right and the ex acts up. It happens everytime. But that’s not my problem anymore. I just hate drama but this is what I have to deal with.

I absolutely hate that this is happening to my children. I try and shield them as much as possible, but the ex likes to put on a show I front of them and only does what is right for her. My ex had more of my stuff so I had to contact a lawyer about getting it back. Do you believe the ex wanted to give me my items at the police station with the kids there? She was going to fill up a uhaul drive the kids to the police station, me bring a truck, and unload and load at the police station while the kids sat in the car. I told her absolutely not. Drop the kids off at my house first so the kids can be inside playing and then bring the uhaul to my house so I can unload it. After the lawyers went back and forth she realized that her idea was not good for the kids. I am so tired how she wants to do things in front of the kids.

Last edited by Wolfman; 05/25/20 12:56 PM.

M:42 XW:41
T:19 M: 15
D:13 S:10
BD: 8/10/18
Moved out: 8/18
Moved in: 9/18/18
Moved out: 4/22/19
D papers signed 11/4/19
D final 3/18/20
Joined: Feb 2015
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Next time buy a new computer

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As far as your daughter goes, she had no time to adjust to her father being with a new woman, and now that she’s moved in, she is pretty much telling you she isn’t ready. Regardless of what your ex does, she doesn’t feel ready for this with you. Such huge adjustments for her in a small amount of time. I truly feel for her

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Wolfman Offline OP
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Originally Posted by Ginger1
Next time buy a new computer


The computer had a lot of my work on there. I needed it back. It was part of the divorce agreement. I know this is hard for my daughter. I am trying to make this as easy as possible for my kids. My son is doing well with it. This divorce thing is so hard. I miss my kids so much the days I don’t have them. I had my kids meet my GF a few times before all of this. For my D it doesn’t matter who I date or bring home, she wasn’t going to like them. I am so sorry my kids have to go through this.


M:42 XW:41
T:19 M: 15
D:13 S:10
BD: 8/10/18
Moved out: 8/18
Moved in: 9/18/18
Moved out: 4/22/19
D papers signed 11/4/19
D final 3/18/20
Joined: Dec 2019
Posts: 426
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Wolfman, Im sorry for what you're going through, you both sound like youre both still healing from it all. I don't have sitch advice. On the computer end, did the hard drive shatter? If not you can still retrieve the contents once you get a new computer. It may not all be lost.


H37, W37
D4, S2
ILYBNILWY 9/19
BD 9/19
EA discovered 10/19
Currently in limbo, no D or S process initiated
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Wolfman, your GF could be Mary freakin’ poppies, but if your daughter ain’t ready, she ain’t ready. Everything happened so whirlwind. Your GF happened right away. Your kids met your GF a few times and then you all moved in?!?

Boys, they are whatever. They don’t give a crap. Girls, they take longer to adjust to a new woman in their life. They never even got the chance to adjust to the divorce before you brought someone else in the picture. She could be the most wonderful woman in the world, but your daughter wasn’t ready, wasn’t eased in, and is still dealing with so much.

She wasn’t ready for some other woman living in her house getting her dads attention. I’m sorry .

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Wolfman Offline OP
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Ginger. It did happen so fast. I didn’t expect to have someone in my life so quick either. You mentioned about my GF getting my attention over my D. Most of the time my GF gives me plenty of time with just my kids. She is good like that. I know my D sees this woman in my life like the enemy to her mom, but that isn’t my fault. My ex is the one who wanted the divorce. I have moved on and maybe my GF and I have moved quick, but that’s just how it went. I am looking for a psychologist for my D and I to go to. I really want to work this out with her. I love my kids so much. I hope this new therapy will work with her.

As far as the ex and I it has been great. There is basically no contact anymore. It was impossible trying to speak to her. It had to be her way or else it would be a problem. Overall it’s so sad it all had to get to this point. I have read a lot of stories on here and a lot of you have gone through some real hard times. But it looks like my ex is one of the top crazy ones on here.


M:42 XW:41
T:19 M: 15
D:13 S:10
BD: 8/10/18
Moved out: 8/18
Moved in: 9/18/18
Moved out: 4/22/19
D papers signed 11/4/19
D final 3/18/20
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 9,227
Likes: 309
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Wolf Wolf Wolf. Boy you are something else. I’m sure it’s your Ex’s fault you moved your GF in what less then 6 months since your D?

I’m not a psychologist but I have read that when someone has narcissistic traits everything is always someone else’s fault.

When you have some time read TBSAKJ’s and see how responsible people handle post divorce relationships.

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