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I think that’s why they say kids are destroyed by divorce. It’s not so much the divorce itself it’s how the parents handle it.

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Right......I asked them if they had expressed themselves like that towards their mom and my oldest said no. I guess they feel more comfortable talking to me. I am sure them seeing me and their mom getting along doesnt help but I would think us fighting and arguing would be so much worse.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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Definitely no easy way that’s for sure.

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Nope.....it's interesting that they have not had these conversations with their mom and she has been dating her BF for much longer than the Doc and I. I believe they place a very high value on our family home and maybe that is their way of holding on to their mom and I getting back together.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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I think they feel you guys are much more serious than her mom and BF. Probably a part of the reason they opened up to you. It is great that your kids can safely express their feelings to you. It is a big transition. And I’m sure when it all does happen they will adjust. It might be also an adjustment in sharing their dad with the docs son for such an extended period of time that triggered them . Not so much the doc. And they know that will be a reality if you guys marry. But I know you’ll make sure you still get your alone time with your girls .

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They are back to their normal selves today however I do sense a little competition between my oldest and the Doc's son. Since the Doc's son is an only child he is used to getting his way. My oldest is used to being the game master as my youngest just goes along with what my oldest wants to do. So my oldest and the Doc's son have bumped heads on a few occasions. He is also very used to everyone being interested in what he has to say. My daughters could care less so they really don't give him any direction attention. He is also very naive, sheltered, and hasn't had a lot of one on one interaction with other kids. In addition he has no male role models in his life so he is kind of soft and wimpy. HE spends all of his time around his nanny, Grandma, and his Aunt all of which don't give him that rough and tumble little boy interaction. I mean he doesn't even know how to play kick ball but he can recite bible verses.

I told the Doc last Sunday he was a p$ssy. That didn't go over to well although she understood what I was trying to say. I apologized and told her it was poor word choice. It did come out wrong and I felt bad although a few days ago she told him to grow a pair. smile


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 9,227
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Originally Posted by TBSakaJ9

I told the Doc last Sunday he was a p$ssy. That didn't go over to well. )


That didn’t go over well. Hunh who would of thought? Lol

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Lol.....I believe in honesty lh!


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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Yeah, LH beat me to it. Seriously, you thought that WOULD go over well?!?!?!? Think about it....what if she said your daughters were bitches? Would that go over well, even with some sort of explanation about what she actually meant? Yikes, J9..............

As for your daughters, you clearly have a very strong bond with them and make them feel safe since they can talk to you. That’s awesome! Good job, dad.


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
6 grandkids
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I know...she knows it wasnt from a bad place.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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