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CanBird #2886904 02/22/20 08:12 PM
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Hi, Can. I'm sorry you're in that place where everything feels fresh again. I've been in and out of the dark lately. Gardening helps me, too—I hope it's bringing you some light. There are studies, aren't there, that show digging in the dirt makes people happier? I believe it. I'm sending good wishes your way that the perfect job will present itself at the right time. ((Can))


T: 16 M:10
BD 6/2019
CanBird #2887174 02/25/20 05:02 PM
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~J~ Thank you all for the kind posts. This truly is a wild ride.

This week I have another job interview & I'm also meeting a potential nanny/sitter. The job is very close to home. Hopefully the pay & benifits are good (they did not adverise either).

This month is almost over. How quickly it's gone by. Haven't heard a peep from 00. It's been almost a week. I sent a video of D3. She misses him & understands he's "traveling". A friend of 00s inquiered about him via text & then came by (picked something up). "Is everything okay? He's just ghosted everyone?! As YOU guys/girls okay?". I didn't want to get into it, said 00 was away...work stuff...he'll be back for a bit, then work again. All true.

"The Grass isn’t Always Greener". I've been telling myself that lately. Whatever helps right? And I've also been a bit better at "Letting Go". Telling yourself to "Let Go", has always sounded harsh to me. But I saw the words "Letting Go", written somewhere, and reading it like that was easier to digest. Does that make sense? Whatever works right?

Be well everyone.
Sending ((Hugs)) out to those that need it. Give them out if you can.




Last edited by CanBird; 02/25/20 05:06 PM.

~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
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Can, just remember that the cycles are normal so when you get to a down time, remember there will be an up time after. I love how you are tackling everything.

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Sending you big big hugs.

Hard as this is, please remember you did not cause it, you could not stop it and you cannot fix it. This drags out for years and years. It is a second adolescence of sorts. It is easier to have him out of the house and “out of sight/out of mind” than to watch the unravelling.

Focus on you and your d. It will get easier; we promise! You are doing so well!


Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13
BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself
BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room"
8/15: H back to MBR
10/15: H back in dorm room
1/18: H files, now divorced
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((Can))

You are a doing great

What ever works YES!

It may be something different each day

The right job will come


married 14 years
H 42
bomb 2/07 IDLYA
D final 3 /09
M ow D ow
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Originally Posted by OwnIt
Can, just remember that the cycles are normal so when you get to a down time, remember there will be an up time after. I love how you are tackling everything.


Thank you Ownit. So true. Your words will be on my mind when that next cycle hits. When you get knocked down, you get up. Again & Again.


~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
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Posts: 715
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Originally Posted by HaWho
Sending you big big hugs.

Hard as this is, please remember you did not cause it, you could not stop it and you cannot fix it. This drags out for years and years. It is a second adolescence of sorts. It is easier to have him out of the house and “out of sight/out of mind” than to watch the unravelling.

Focus on you and your d. It will get easier; we promise! You are doing so well!


Thank you HaWho. I need to write your post as a reminder. I suppose it is better that his "journey" isn't happening in front of my face. We that care, the Left Behind, are left to wonder.

I have to keep moving on.


~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 715
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Originally Posted by peacetoday
((Can))

You are a doing great

What ever works YES!

It may be something different each day

The right job will come



Thank you Peace. I believe good things come.


~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 715
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~J~ My heart jumped at hearing his alert on my phone. Oh a video for D3, how nice. Nine seconds. Yep. Wow. That's it? 9 SECONDS. Wow. All smiles, choked up. Guess he never really was one to talk much. (Never wanted to talk about anything).

I responded like I was D3, via text. No reply if he wanted to talk more. I left it with have a safe flight. It was obvious he was at the airport. He's got a thing for work coming up. That is a week long. And from there? Who knows. Actions speak louder than words right?

He knows where we are. Expect nothing. Zero expectations.

*Almost Time for a New Thread. Perfect timing.*


~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
CanBird #2887497 02/28/20 06:22 AM
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~J~ I had another job interview. I'll know Monday. Felling unsure.

00 landed at his new destination for his next mission. (Not here). My source told me he's connecting with a family member. Family & friends are concerned about 00's state of mind. The fact that 00 contacted his brother is huge. He had been avoiding family. Hopefully 00 gets more off his chest. The childhood stuff. The depression. The MLC.

I'm down again. Reminding myself that tomorrow will be different. Another day, another way.


~Never Give Up ~
2019
Mar BD
June BD
Dec Aow/xgf
2020
Jan he wants D
Feb he flys2 ow
Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn
Apr he leaves for work until Nov
Oct D FINAL 2020
Living MY Happiest Life Ever
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