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Originally Posted by TBSakaJ9
I also just spent $140 bucks on 2 dozen roses for our Anniversary. When can I graduate to grocery store flowers?????
Personally I've had huge success in just giving the florist some general guidelines on colour and theme and a budget. Usually for $50 Canadian (about 75 cents US smile ) they can usually do something spectacular.

The florists I think like this as well as it allows them to both be creative and to use up the in-season stock that they have. My florist was telling me a few months ago that there was an on-going rose shortage because most of ours come from Columbia and there was some sort of availability issue.

And for the person who gets them, they get something different and "special" each time while all you have to do is just wave vaguely and leave the actual deciding up to someone else.

Does the Dr have a favourite flower? What are her favourite colours? We know that she loves her ranch and shooting stuff.

Silly side story. There was a friend I had in LA (not Lower Alabama) who I would send flowers to from time to time to cheer them up. After about the second or third order, suddenly I found I was on a preferred customer list and saw a note sent to the designer admonishing them to be "fabulous". This is a shop that mainly catered to the studio trade. I emailed them to mention that I'm just some random dude from Canada who is cheering up a friend who happened to live in LA and they assured me that I was indeed considered a premium customer.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
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I’m sure if we would have made that 3 weeks we had to go to our 1 year , he wouldn’t even have acknowledged the day. Probably dumped me so he didn’t have to acknowledge it.


Ginger - most definitely!

In fact there's apparently a real trend of guys breaking up with girls before Xmas or Valentine's day to avoid the whole present thing. Guess it's harder to fake interest when he pressure's on.

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And some sexy time

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Valentines Day is around the corner so maybe I can change it up then. I just told her that I loved her and that she was amazing in every way and of course I wished her a Happy 1 Year.

I have a hard time expressing my feelings sometimes. Something I need to work on.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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Originally Posted by TBSakaJ9

I have a hard time expressing my feelings sometimes. Something I need to work on.


I think that can be an issue for people. I'm a very touchy feely and expressive person, but Sparky is not. However, he'll be very loving at random odd times. He says he's doing it because he likes how it feels when I do it to him and he's making a concerted effort to give me the same feeling without making me feel like I'm having to ask for it (thus the random odd times). Like, last night, we went to bed and the dog was hyper so it took her a few minutes to settle in. As we were petting and loving on her to get her settled, he said very out of the blue "thank you for being here for me and for loving me and being my wife". It was very genuine and very sweet. Effort is attractive. You might not always be on the same page expressing your feelings, but just showing you are trying will win you a WHOLE lot of points. And, I'm sure the dr notices such things.


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
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I think you can effectively express your feelings through words, not actions. And you seem Like you expressed your feelings well.

Let’s just say, as another example of M, he could tell me
How amazing I was, how much he loved me, how he appreciates everything I do for him and how I am always there for him.

But he couldn’t show me.

And I use him as an example when I mention things to you, because quite honestly, your R with the doctor was apart of what made me question my R with M. I could have only wished he was half the boyfriend you are to the Dr.

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I concur with G about your boyfriend quality with the dr. You do seem, at least from this perspective, to put a lot of time and effort into it and into making it all LOOK effortless to her. You clearly care for her deeply and make sure she feels that in both words and actions. Not all men are that way and sadly, a lot who aren't don't even really care to try and be that way and a little effort goes a long way with most women. I, personally, think it is a sign of maturity in a relationship. It isn't so much about putting the dr on a pedestal, but it is treating her well because she treats you well.


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
6 grandkids
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I meant to say “words and actions”

You are a good partner. You are both fortunate to have each other

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You both are too kind, you're going to make me cry.. I think sometimes i don't realize how much I care for her. Then it just hits me when I really think about. I feel some of that has to do with how easy she has made it for me. I am not used to someone who treats me as well as she does.

We both tell each other quite frequently how lucky we are to have met. Still waiting to have our first fight smile


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
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Posts: 3,401
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Oh, you are totally smitten with the dr. If you could read your posts objectively (which you totally cannot because you are both living and writing them), you would see it like we all do. I mean, seriously....all the thought you put into her Christmas gifts and asking for our thoughts just to check yourself.

I'm glad you found someone like the dr. I think she has shown you that what some of us ladies on the board were telling you all along was true IS true. There are good, solid women out there who don't play games and know how to treat men well and know how to have a loving, mature, adult relationship. Just because some of are left behind doesn't mean that we are trash or not worthy of love or don't know how to love. It just means we had stupid partners. LOL

I think the key is not only do you tell each other you are lucky, but you SHOW each other you are lucky and actions always speak louder than words. As far as waiting for the first fight, Sparky and I started dating 2 years ago, got married 2 weeks ago, and we have had some minor disagreements that we immediately talked through and resolved, but we have yet to have a big fight because neither of us are confrontational and we really try to focus on talking about things as soon as they come up rather than letting them fester. It has served us well as a couple.


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
6 grandkids
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