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Originally Posted by doodler
Furthermore, she's Canadian. What good could come of this?
Canadian girls know best how to keep a man warm - just sayin smile

I suppose I should do a Saturday post even if a bit late. Bit of an odd day in some ways. S had reached out to me towards the end of the week and suggested that I hang out with her at her place, watch a movie and have dinner with her and her family since it's her custody weekend. I backed away from that pretty quickly. I did agree to do some electrical work and install a light fixture she had picked up at a thrift shop some time ago. Glad I did as the previously installed fixture was done in a very unsafe way. The wire nuts just fell off as soon as I looked at them. Not kidding there.
They actually fell out of the box exposing bare wires. A trip to the hardware store for $5 of pieces (paid for by S) was necessary, fixture installed - safely - and tested and it's all good. I'd brought in some of my own supplies and used three fresh wire nuts (including ground) and a certain amount of electrical tape to keep everything in place.

As a result though I did get introduced to S12/S17 when they wandered past who pretty much ignored my existence. D18 and her boyfriend also passed through. I've known D18 for a number of years as she works from time to time at the cafe around the corner. S joked with me that D18 had insisted "no boys in your room with the door closed". The door did indeed stay open. I also ended up meeting XH#2 who unexpectedly stopped by to see the boys and run some errands with them so we escaped and went for a hike. XH#2 seems like a decent enough fellow although a bit flaky. It was interesting hearing them talk about various things in the kitchen before XH#2 knew I was there, school trips yadda yadda in a polite and adult fashion. I believe they've been divorced for about 11 years and he's been punctual(ish) with his various obligations.

Long talks on our hikes as usual. S seems to relish the fact that she has another adult to talk to who actually listens. S has kept her kids informed and said that they have asked if I've turned in to a giant man-baby yet like my predecessors. The answer was no. I am sure that they have their doubts still though. S also said that when she was in Ottawa recently visiting D25 and her new grandbaby she asked about me there too since D25 has known me for quite a few years and been by the house multiple times when she and my S25 were part of the same group of random kids. I passed that test too I was told. It's good that she's being cautious and making sure that I'm bona-fide which is so much easier in our circumstance. For me, I'm finding that she has a lot more depth and solidity to her character mixed with a flavouring of slightly kooky fun.

I suppose that this is rather different from most dating experiences as there is that past history. I was pleased when putting up the light fixture that S and I worked well together. She seemed fine with the fact that I needed to be sure that everything was pre-planned out and that all the pieces were organized before the work started. She was good at passing along the tools as necessary when I was up on the ladder.

So - one more hurdle leaped over in apparent great haste. And yes - I am fully aware that she is a huntress. But she also appears to be ok with the fact that I'm - by some perspectives - taking it slow. I did open up to her that one of my biggest issues is finding the ability to trust which is independent of any attraction.


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Good Morning Andrew

Originally Posted by AndrewP
...fixture installed - safely - and tested and it's all good. I'd brought in some of my own supplies and used three fresh wire nuts (including ground) and a certain amount of electrical tape to keep everything in place.

Good job!

Me and electrons, we got a bond. It’s nice to see you ensuring they remain where their suppose to be. Lol.

I did backspace my paragraph of Dad joke type humour, using words like higher state, valence, shell, orbits, potential, resistance, current, wire nuts (haha - pretty sure I would get in trouble), etc... It’s early Sunday morning, just waking up, eating toast and drinking coffee; as I was deleting my words I realized - potential.

Our relationships are driven like electrical circuits. Each of us is a power source. Each with our own resistances, and potentials (voltage). Between two people, two sources, there is a current, a flow, a connection. It’s the potential that drives us, with out it we are stagnant and unchanging.

It is necessary to like the person in front you, for sure; to have a connection. And to want to meet the “potential” person within them and ourselves. We, like the simple electron, are drawn back to our own and other potential sources.

A few days ago you mentioned about being drawn to the potential of someone, and how you are now just looking at what is in front of you. Again the electron - it is wise to realize that you need to have present attraction and yet still be drawn to her potential, and her to your’s.

Potential is what we grow into, it grows a relationship. I see much potential between you and S, and that is worthy of exploring. Keep going slow(ish), for electrons are zippy fast. And even tape on your wire nuts will not make much difference - just as it should be. smile

DnJ


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Originally Posted by DnJ
And even tape on your wire nuts will not make much difference - just as it should be. smile
This has my vote for DnJ wins the internet. The funniest thing I've read here in a long time.

Thank you my friend.


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Happy Halloween Eve! One of my favourite days of the year. The weather forecast is very uncertain so as is typical in Canada I expect a number of trick or treaters to be wearing costumes over snow suits. I pull my sloop out and decorate her up as a pirate ship which everyone thinks is awesome but is actually pretty easy other than man-handling the weight of boat and trailer. I'll probably hand out candy from the front porch rather than sitting out in the cockpit. I'm choosing to skip the rum this year - might have mulled apple cider instead.

Even though it was her custody weekend with S12, S and I went out to a craft show the next village over on Sunday. I am presuming that she had S17 "in charge" and they knew where we were and how to get in touch. I suspect we are looking more like a couple from how people were treating us. After we went to a local coffee shop and visited until they threw us out in the late afternoon. S bought a couple of things at the show which was an obvious bit of pain for her as cash is short and was happy to get the free samples. I made no movement towards my own wallet and S didn't look in my direction at any time as she admired the various items for sale. She did think that I needed to buy a "let's get naked" sign for my bedroom though which remained un-bought.

S did surprise me when she announced while we were walking to the car hand in hand with a big smile that she had decided to keep me - if that was ok with me. I didn't object.

Since S25 was out for Sunday Supper (presumably with his mother), I did a solo version. Broiled steak, cauliflower with cheese sauce. It was in some ways a nice change to have the reduced pressure especially since I had to fit my usual weekend chores into the much more limited time available. I made my very first apple crisp using apples that I had bought when out with S the previous weekend. It turned out rather well even though there wasn't ice cream for it - not something I normally have in stock. It must have been good because when S25 got home he was very enthusiastic about it - I do know that it is his favourite desert. He was also in a decent mood which I was worried about. Often when he gets home from seeing his mother he's in a grump. Hopefully she's guiding him along in ways that I seem to be unable to. I do know that he's pretty worried because the pub where he gets a minimal number of hours has been closed due to an illness in the family and probably will stay closed for a while. He's picked up a bit of work helping the owner with home repairs and stuff. He's still not showing any signs of an active job hunt. I do hope though that his mother continues to engage with him - something I would have resented a couple of years ago.

He seems to continue to be blase about my seeing S although I am sure that he knows that it is getting more serious even if he judges just by the number of times we see each other.

Fairly busy at work for me as I continue to ignore things like job titles. I was running around for the president of our acid division checking production issues (is low mercury sulphuric "supposed" to be green?) and it was nice as I learned a bunch. I've also completed my first round of safety training which I will admit was pretty easy because a couple of the programs I actually helped set up. Redefining myself in a time of transition and being flexible and the "go-to" guy I think is good. I know that S seemed concerned about my concern about job stability but these days, who doesn't have that itch in the back of their head that things could abruptly go sideways.

In the world of WTH - B has resurfaced after a fashion. I would occasionally check to see if I was still blocked and earlier this week guess who popped up. I had a look and she's changed her "home city" from "up north" where "her" house is, to the town just to the north of me where she had been living when we met. Presumably she's still there and didn't get back together with her H. He still has me blocked as do suddenly B's youngest son who she had moved in with along with her step-son who I had always presumed had no clue who I am. Something and perhaps something dramatic is undoubtedly going on. The temptation to reach out and see how she's doing is certainly there but is I know something that I shouldn't do. Setting aside the rapidly growing relationship I have with S, there were things about the relationship between B and I that were fundamentally not working and I can't see those changing even if we both were willing to give it another try. Which isn't even on the table. I do need to determine what my response would be if she does reach out. Friendly but do not engage beyond that. I do still like her. I wouldn't have dated her if I didn't like the person that she is.

---------------

S is having a very busy week but is still making time for us. She met with her accountant on Monday (a friend that does it as a favour) and with a lawyer on Tuesday. She had asked me so I recommended my ex-wife's lawyer. A very tough lady who is no nonsense. She ended up meeting with her son who has joined the practice and said that she got a lot of useful and honest information in her free consult. I don't know what all it was about and it is none of my business. We're getting together most likely for dinner tonight - I'm finding a lot of restaurants are gluten friendly if you dig. She's working at a side hustle around the corner tomorrow and will stop by the house for a smooch and bag of candy. On Friday she's doing a pop-up shop for her psychic side hustle and has no clue how she's going to get it all done. Saturday we're going to the craft show here in my village - one of the biggest in the area and I was thinking of making her dinner and asking S25 to be scarce.

I know that I am well in the grips of limerence. Even thinking about her puts a jolt of dopamine into my system. It feels nice. I've mentioned to her that I have some vacation days to use up before the end of the year and that we might escape for a day or so which she seems to like the idea of. I've done some research and found an isolated inn located next to a waterfall and backing on to a nature area that has gluten free options on the menu that we may run away to sometime in November.

Ignoring the hormonal hits - I am focusing as well as I can on the short term. I have no doubt that S has a longer term vision. She often talks about how her life will change soon when 3 of the 4 kids and 3 of the 5 pets move out in what she hopes is the near future. She doesn't talk about "us" or any role I may have. I still have that under-current of "not wanting to be taken advantage of" which I've been honest with her about. I have peeked into my crystal ball and know that longer term there are specific issues around basic every-day things that we view differently that would have to be addressed along with undoubtedly many many unknown unknowns. So I'm choosing to not look at that at present. Recognize that it exists but enjoying the now and the person that she is and the times we have together.

Happy Halloween everyone!


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Originally Posted by AndrewP
Happy Halloween Eve!

Andrew,

I have a huge 2x4 for you...

Are you telling us that in Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan you use the metric calendar for Thanksgiving and the imperial calendar for Halloween? That's totally messed up.

Since you mentioned your sloop; do you know how those of us living in southern Trumpistan know when it's Thanksgiving in Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan? Answer: The Annapolis boat show is always on Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan Thanksgiving. Cool huh?

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You seem to know an awful lot about the goings-on in Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan, doodler. That leads me to believe that 1.) southern Trumpistan is getting to you or 2.) YOU are a Kanuk disguised as a Trumpet and you are just here to stir stuff. Now my conspiracy theories are running rampant. Suppose you and Andrew are actually pretending to be the other one, sort of an Andrew/doodler Freaky Friday thing going on. Maybe you are the Kanuk and he's the Floridian and y'all are just messing with us. Or maybe you are even just different personalities within the same body...……..is that why we haven't heard from Vanilla lately? Have y'all taken her personality over? Inquiring minds want to know! Vanilla, if you are in there, blink twice!!!!! We miss you, sweet lady.


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Originally Posted by Dawn70
You seem to know an awful lot about the goings-on in Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan, doodler.

I've always wanted to be the Canadian Minister of Silly Walks, but since I live in Florida I'd have to telecommute. I thought the irony would be overwhelming so I never pursued the dream.

I've learned a lot about Canada from watching a YouTube channel named "Cruising Off Duty." It's a Canadian husband and wife who are looking for catamaran for blue water sailing. When they retire they want to sail around the world on a catamaran. They do a lot of reviews of catamarans so I watch their channel and I suffer through the funny Canadian accent and over pronunciation.

I'm going to take a deep dive into what I'm sure is a sensitive subject, but someone needs to openly state the obvious. All Americans, if they're honest, would admit that they've wondered why Canada is a country and not the 51st state of the United States. It seems like a useless redundancy that Canada is a country rather than a U.S. state. I'm sure most Canadians have thought that as well.

Here's the thing, remember when Trump wanted to buy Greenland but Denmark wouldn't sell? No one owns Canada. It doesn't have to be bought. All you have to do is get a cartographer to redraw the borders of the U.S. and voilà, Canada becomes the 51st state. The hardest part of the process is trying to fit the 51st star on the American flag. It makes so much sense that I think it the right thing to do.

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Dawn - I think you hit upon something important here. While I can certainly assure you that I'm not doodler, I am not sure that doodler can convince you that he's not me. After all, have you ever seen us both in the same room at the same time? Hmmmm?

And also keep in mind too that Florida is in fact already a region of Canada and has been for some time. Even before the stock market crash of 2008 most of Florida was populated by aging pallid Canadians who filled the early bird buffet tables depriving the locals of much needed potato salad. After the US Peso dropped in value we traded the Stanley Cup and two Mounties and acquired what parts of the now former state we didn't already own. However since we are unfailingly polite, we've not bothered to rub in in the face of the rest of your "country" which many of us still refuse to recognize as anything other than some colonists who we haven't gotten around to ending their silly rebellion.

This undoubtedly bothers doodler a lot having to learn how to properly pronounce poutine and foyer and recognize that last letter of the alphabet is properly pronounced Zed (Kneel before Zed!). Having a British next door neighbour (notice our sneaky extra vowels) doesn't really help as the Brits are Canadians that just didn't try hard enough to be polite although they do make a decent beer. This is the real reason why he wants to move. Not because he's downsizing or has run out of ways to use Venetian plaster, but because he is metamorphosing into a toque wearing, sorry saying, door holding Kanuk. And his own ex-wife undoubtedly no longer recognizes him.

PS - Will trade the MBA championship for the Stanley Cup and a quart of maple syrup. You can maybe have parts of Florida and Arizona back. We will continue our dominance of your entertainment industry though, especially the comedys.


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Originally Posted by AndrewP
Dawn - I think you hit upon something important here. While I can certainly assure you that I'm not doodler, I am not sure that doodler can convince you that he's not me. After all, have you ever seen us both in the same room at the same time? Hmmmm?

This undoubtedly bothers doodler a lot having to learn how to properly pronounce poutine and foyer and recognize that last letter of the alphabet is properly pronounced Zed (Kneel before Zed!). Having a British next door neighbour (notice our sneaky extra vowels) doesn't really help as the Brits are Canadians that just didn't try hard enough to be polite although they do make a decent beer. This is the real reason why he wants to move. Not because he's downsizing or has run out of ways to use Venetian plaster, but because he is metamorphosing into a toque wearing, sorry saying, door holding Kanuk. And his own ex-wife undoubtedly no longer recognizes him.



I have not, in fact, seen y'all together. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm…….so that just goes to show I was on the right track. For me the true test will be what doodler calls that piece of furniture in his living room that most of us backwards Arkies just call a couch. If doodler calls it a "divan" then I'll know y'all are, indeed, one and the same. Look at me solving mysteries. I'm like the whole Scooby Doo gang all wrapped up in one person.


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These days I'm really big into sailing and catamarans. I don't currently sail and I don't have a catamaran, but a guy can dream...

Anyway, given my affinity for sailing and catamarans, I call that thing in my living room a "settee."

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