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#2863594 08/30/19 09:44 PM
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H (me) 56 ; W 54 ; M 32 ; D 32 ; D 30 ; S 21 ; Grandkids: 12, 11, 10, 8, 1
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Originally Posted by "Turbine"
Quick update.
W: Bring a truck to move your stuff. You don't have to sort in the house it will take you forever.

Me: Placing a condition like that mid afternoon on Friday of a holiday weekend is unreasonable. I will be there to sort my stuff in the morning.

So is my response sound good for DB?

Calling her condition "Unreasonable" probably doesn't count as validation. "I get you're worried about how long this will take. I plan to stick to what we agreed to--Sat, Xpm to Ypm."

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Well Saturday fell apart. While running the errands I needed to the car started hesitating like it wanted to stall out at low rpm. Check engine light came on and was intermittent. This was just in the shop! Now it is back at the shop. Fortunately two of our kids were close and picked me up. If they were home it would be more like 45 minutes or more.
We visited Bailey, used to be our dog. Still remembered our son.

So the car is aggravating. On top of all the rest of the dog pile as of late.

Gets hard to not just toss your hands up and go I quit. Lots of push to end this. I still am torn. So this just drags it out more.

Enjoy your day everyone.

I'm praying for some good friends in Florida. Thought she was in remission but not the case. He has had multiple strokes and messed his short term memory a bit. He doesn't remember many people he worked with but he does remember me. Faith is tested in many was.


H (me) 56 ; W 54 ; M 32 ; D 32 ; D 30 ; S 21 ; Grandkids: 12, 11, 10, 8, 1
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Happiness has to be found within yourself. Yet I am still very much hing up on remaining with her.
I dreamed about her last night. Okay after I dozed off again. This 2 am stuff is getting so old. I can't make her happy. I would like to provide times where we can be happy together. I am happy with her. Or was. I want to have that chance to know. Kids are saying she has never been what I thought. Which is criticism of a choice I made. Not Happy about that.

I can't afford a lawyer anymore. Would have been better to just pay some of the debt.

So yes I am still very annoyed with this whole thing. My part, my inability or lack of desire to move on. You have no idea how much I despise that whole phrase. Her, not responding or even being civil in dealing with the house.

Am I calmer and better than i was over a year ago? Perhaps. Right now I am going to get ready and walk three miles to get to the repair shop and see if they might have a loaner for today. At the very least update them as to why it is back again.


H (me) 56 ; W 54 ; M 32 ; D 32 ; D 30 ; S 21 ; Grandkids: 12, 11, 10, 8, 1
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Car is fixed. Yea!!!

On the other hand W is not moving. Text exchange ran not chance or reconcile. I asked for house key. She asked why. New locks and I'd like to get my stuff/sort on my schedule. She asked about a truck and to let her know, weekend is good. I told her no, done with her games. Court papers say I can be there and I asked her if she is saying I can't. She asked why am I making this so hard. Go through my stuff on my schedule. Her attendance not required. Supply a key. Not hard.

This is a long temper tantrum. Both lawyers are sick of this and her lawyer quit because no payment. I am going to petition for dismissal. She is wasting time and not cooperating with court orders.

DBing? Probably not.

Is she justified in her list of complaints. Sure.

I didn't just roll over and give her what she wanted right away. something I would do before. Changes... that's what we are supposed to initiate right. Positive changes. So gym, church, reading some help books. The therapist... not so much.


H (me) 56 ; W 54 ; M 32 ; D 32 ; D 30 ; S 21 ; Grandkids: 12, 11, 10, 8, 1
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This is good Turbine, keep going with what is fair and court ordered. Do not put up with her not wanting to comply just because it doesn't suit her. You're spot-on when you say, "this is a long temper tantrum". Yep!

And you can't reason with toddlers.

I'm concerned you're texting her about things that are not logistical in nature. A R talk via text? Stop that. It's not going to go anywhere and it's going to A) Make her dig her heals in more because she knows she can hurt you and B) Just hurt you.

The burner is hot. Please stop putting your hand on it.

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Okay, poorly explained. She texted me about no chance or reconcile. I didn't comment on that at all. Stuck to the logistical stuff.


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That is GREAT Turbine. Thanks for clarifying. And bizarre of her to just text that unprovoked.

I'm really, really pleased to hear you've stuck to the logistical and taking one slow step at a time. That's all we can do.

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Good for you Turbine! You are sounding like you are doing a bit better. Glad you got your car fixed. smile

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Two more days at Fermi and then I am job hunting. (Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm job hunting) I did get a list from the engineer I am reporting to of the agencies they hire contractors from. So that is a plus. Letters of recommendation... also a plus.

Still not getting home. Cardio night at the gym and Chick-fil-A for dinner. Just the sandwich. I ate in my car outside Ray's. He used to be my parents neighbor and I am currently staying with him. Good arrangement so far. Several pizzas, a few meals at Finn McCool's and a Chinese dinner so far. I take out the trash and help when I can. Ray is in his eighties and still really sharp.

I wanted to sit on my driveway and eat. (mile from Ray's) I want to sleep in my bed. i haven't been home since my trip to Spa Le'Psych in May. That was one of the biggest things I wanted to do while I was in that place. Some days this feeling is worse than others and time at the gym isn't enough. Talking to Jim, Johhny, Jack, or the tiki dude isn't the answer so that is out too.

Old boss said he would give me a recommend and asked if I would stop by. Coffee and catch up. He has a few ideas he wanted my opinion on. Why not.

She didn't make the mortgage payment this month. Following is the text exchange:

Me: I have not seen any email about the mortgage being paid for September. The house gets foreclosed there will be no money and still will owe. This is unacceptable.

Her: You pay some, you don't sign the divorce that applies still married.

Me:You didn't help for a year. You made me homeless. You changed the locks so I can't work on my stuff. I have been paying all the car insurance. Stop playing games. You want this then cooperate.
Me: I also will be unemployed October 1st.

Her:You're always like that..
Homeless??

Me: What did you think would happen? I have slept in my car.

Her: Because that's what you wanted, don't you realize? You keep telling me before when you are in the house, you always screamed at me to get out of the house and you would say not giving me any Penney and you put the house for foreclosure. Very sad thought..

Me: Yes, I yelled. I was loosing my forever partner. I didn't want this. I didn't want a roommate. I wanted my wife. Even though we were not agreeing.
Me: There was just too much.
Me: My behavior was wrong. I shouldn't have yelled at you for any reason. I hurt you by yelling.

Her: That partner it wasn't really yours, thats why this what happened. You don't take care of her nor depend. You treat her like a slave, she will never go back. You call her bitch. Ther's nothing for you to hope. You just wasting your time.

Me: I regret you feel that way. I regret calling you by any term that was disrespectful.

Yeah... some of that could be better on my part. Not sure about the third person stuff by her. She didn't know or ask about my working so the time at Fermi is unknown. Her last two sentences... Sees the changes and doesn't believe them? I don't know. Mountain out of a molehill on my part?

Well I am feeling a bit better. Tired too so maybe I will sleep really well tonight.


H (me) 56 ; W 54 ; M 32 ; D 32 ; D 30 ; S 21 ; Grandkids: 12, 11, 10, 8, 1
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