CALL 303-444-7004 to get started right away!

 

 


A Divorce Busting® Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.


A Divorce Busting Telephone Coach
can help you save your marriage singlehandedly!
CALL 303-444-7004
or see Coaching Packages online at the Divorce Busting Store

A Message from Michele
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 10 11
Working on it #2862403
08/22/19 12:31 PM
08/22/19 12:31 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
Ginger1  Offline OP
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
Previous Thread:

Clearly haven't figured it out

For some reason posts to my thread werenít showing up for me after my last big one this morning. Weird. Maybe I need a new thread.

He replied this morning

ďThanks, we are good for now, we are staying with family close byĒ

Havenít responded

Last edited by job; 08/22/19 12:35 PM. Reason: added link to previous thread
Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862405
08/22/19 12:32 PM
08/22/19 12:32 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 26,434
Southern Maryland
job Online

Member
job  Online

Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 26,434
Southern Maryland
It wasn't because you needed to start a new thread. I had that same issue viewing other posts several weeks ago. However, I'm glad you started a new thread.

Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862406
08/22/19 12:39 PM
08/22/19 12:39 PM
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
T
TBSakaJ9 Offline
Member
TBSakaJ9  Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
And I would not respond


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862411
08/22/19 01:19 PM
08/22/19 01:19 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
Ginger1  Offline OP
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
ďMaybe Iím looking in the wrong places and finding the wrong peopleĒ

Where am I supposed to be looking ?! Clue me in!

I havenít responded and I have training someone today so Iíll have to be a good little girl and focus and work anyways.

Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862412
08/22/19 01:20 PM
08/22/19 01:20 PM
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,662
Canada
A
AndrewP Offline
Member
AndrewP  Offline
Member
A
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,662
Canada
BACK AWAY FROM THE BUMBLE!

((Ginger1))

I know there's a temptation to look. I saw a really cute woman on POF where I lurk a year or so older than I am who describes herself as a "sapiophile", has masses of freckles and I DIDN'T CONTACT HER.

We both need time to heal ourselves and not use someone else to do it.

How about we both put a mark in the sand and hold each other accountable and not reach out for another partner until September 28th at the earliest. Deal?

You can do this - but you've got to heal first and fully let go of "what could have been" first.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862421
08/22/19 02:22 PM
08/22/19 02:22 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
Ginger1  Offline OP
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
I promise, no dating. I like that pact and the thought of keeping each other accountable.

I have such a full schedule anyways. Beginning of the school year, cheerleading season....Iím busy.

Friday night I am going to chill on the couch and watch bohemian rhapsody. Saturday all day I am doing major yard work. The weather is supposed to be beautiful. And Sunday I work.

I do need time to heal. I feel like I have 85% let go of him. I think I was letting go when we were together.

Iím just tired. My soul is tired

Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862429
08/22/19 03:13 PM
08/22/19 03:13 PM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 1,695
J
JujuB Offline
Member
JujuB  Offline
Member
J
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 1,695
Hey ginger

I gave myself almost almost 3 months after breaking things off with last boyfriend. And I was the one to end things. I was very busy. And just needed to evaluate. I was pretty depressed and in a bad mood during that time. Not because I missed him. More because, I didnít understand why I was ever even with him.

I canít say that I went back on line a fully healed person. I donít believe thatís even possible. And people that think that way will end up never partnering. Iím wondering if itís just a matter of finding a partner thatís dysfunctions mesh with yours in a non abusive way? Kind of like Don finding someone else that wants a casual relationship. Or me, that doesnít mind clinging and feels safe with it? Or maybe a balance between being capable of being vulnerable but healthy enough to maintain personal boundaries and willingness to let go or experience loss when those needs arenít met.

I had posted in your last thread to google the term ďlove addictĒ. Someone just told me about it yesterday. It kind of fits in with codependency but a bit different. Do you see yourself in that role?


M: 42
H: 43
Twins age 5
WAH in summer
Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862435
08/22/19 03:32 PM
08/22/19 03:32 PM
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
T
TBSakaJ9 Offline
Member
TBSakaJ9  Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
I think everyone enters a R at our age jaded to some extent and not able to love as completely as we once did. I don't think I will ever return to level of innocence I had with my xw.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862438
08/22/19 03:54 PM
08/22/19 03:54 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
Ginger1  Offline OP
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 3,942
Confession time.

I responded with a ďyou know where to find me if you need me, again, I am very sorry, please give my best to your familyĒ

I got a thank you in return.


Go ahead 2x4 me. I deserve it. Anyways. I just deleted the texts. Iím done now.

Later tonight I will get to the love addict thing. Interesting what I read. I donít think itís me, although it almost describes me.

We all have baggage and itís how well we carry it and if baggage is compatible

No dating for me now. I donít have that kind of energy

Re: Working on it [Re: Ginger1] #2862444
08/22/19 04:08 PM
08/22/19 04:08 PM
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
T
TBSakaJ9 Offline
Member
TBSakaJ9  Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,985
Oh G.....hes a big boy, he knows. Please no more.


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, job, Virginia 

Save Your Marriage! Schedule Online

Schedule a phone consultation with a Divorce Busting® Coach! Call: 800-664-2435 or 303-444-7004