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Originally Posted by AndrewP

Sooooo - I should be applying the LRT?.




NO!

That technique is for saving a relationship.


This one is not salvageable.

I'm sorry.

xoxoxo


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver
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Andrew,

You cannot compare the end of this R with your ex leaving. B hasn’t shared your life for 20 odd years, producing children and a lifetime of memories.

She has not reached the stage your ex did of ‘is this it? I’ve done the wife and mother thing. Time for my MLC and wanting a life back’.

This is a fledgling romance, that hit the skids, as countless do.

You will see, as others have said, she has done you the biggest favour.

I know you’re hurting, but please look now to your Spanish trip (thank God you booked it) and enjoy every minute.

You will be absolutely fine. You know this.

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kml Offline
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Agreed - LRT is NOT for dating!!!!! When this stuff happens in dating, it's a sign that this person is not the one for you and to move on. LRT is for long term relationships where you have kids and history and a reason to try to salvage it.

LET GO needs to be your mantra.

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I think that LRT stuff may have been Andrew's post breakup dry Canadian humour coming through.

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Y'all....OMG......here is how my week has been: computer issues (likely operator error), budget constraints that are leaving me frustrated and just general brain overload. I have been reading these posts since last night going "what the h3ll is LRT?" A light bulb just came on.....last resort techniques.....got it. DUH! Lord have mercy, come ON Friday!

Focus on Spain, Andrew.....focus on Spain. I can't wait to see pictures! laugh


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
6 grandkids
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Originally Posted by doodler
I think that LRT stuff may have been Andrew's post breakup dry Canadian humour coming through.
I used smiley icons and everything too!!

No B contact again today in either direction. There's nothing to say that hasn't been said and saying it again makes no difference. My ex cashed her monthly support payment late this morning. Without comment as always. It's raining lightly over the rail yard where a group of visitors are getting damp in their bright orange "I'm not safety certified" hard-hats. SIL2 sent me a link to a nice looking roll-top desk for $50 which turned in to $100 when I asked if it was solid wood. It's staying where it is.

S24 never emerged again last night - only mumbled through the door. His birthday plans are more or less finalized. His mother hasn't done anything for him on that day for a bunch of years so I don't expect plans to be very messed up. He knows that there is cake from the cafe around the corner. I need to get candles. D27 says she'll "probably" call in for the happy birthday singing. I got him an auto-club membership for his birthday which will probably be his present for the next few years as a renewal. The menu plan is uncertain but I own food. I was thinking of getting a butternut squash for Sunday dinner though. We both quite like that as either just baked or made in to soup. Even though my repertoire is somewhat limited, I like to think I'm a decent cook. I do focus on quality ingredients. I think B left a partial jar of store brand "Miracle whip" in the fridge that I will dispose of. She preferred it to actual mayonnaise. If you were to have walked in to my house in March or again now, you'd only notice that some of 20 something's stuff has been moved from the front porch to under the back stairs and that the futon has been replaced by a couch. Nothing else is different. It's as if B never was there.

I chatted a bit with SIL2 who actually knew B's S38 back in the day. She's unsurprised that he's the source of so many issues and somewhat surprised that he's alive. The story she tells me speaks to a much darker past than I think B realizes. SIL2 also thinks that the idea of me dating someone like FSL who is in her late 30s as well is a good idea. She does agree though that dating someone my own age or even a touch older might make more sense. Not that that is going to be happening right now unless that mythical woman falls from the sky offering me pizza. It's been a long since I had pizza. Possibly close to a year now that I try to think of it. I like pizza.

My travel agent says that some of my info for my trip to Madrid is in the office but I still don't have a firm itinerary and won't know my hotel for sure until 2 weeks prior. Annoying as I like to have everything organized and numbered.

I may start the kitchen renovation this weekend tearing down the false ceiling put in in the 70s. Or maybe the 60s. I won't have to cut the grass. At this time of the year around here it grows rather slowly and I did cut it last week.

Yeah - life moves on.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
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AndrewP Offline OP
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High five requested. Blueberries - one of B's favourite things - are in season at the local pick your own place that I'd tried to get her to a few times. Since she was never around on weekends, we never went.

I didn't let her know.

PS - weekend plans might have changed. One of the "temporary" garages I was looking at came on sale yesterday and the Canadian Tire local to where I was at had one that is now in my shed. The better one that I really wanted came on sale this morning but over-all I'm saving about $150 sticking to the one I already bought.

We now return to looking at bills of lading for TDG Class 8 products.

Thank you.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
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kml Offline
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Andrew, I swear if my younger sister is ever widowed I'll have to introduce you. (Not to be morbid but her husband IS older and an occasionally dry alcoholic). She's smart and nerdy, picks her own berries for jam every year, would LOVE someone who wanted to go to things like that but also happy to hang out at home quilting, loves cats, hardworking and down to earth. And her house has three stories so she's not afraid of stairs!!!

Seriously though - there's a woman like my sister out there for you somewhere, and when you find her she'll be THRILLED.

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AndrewP Offline OP
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Originally Posted by kml
Andrew, I swear if my younger sister is ever widowed I'll have to introduce you. (Not to be morbid but her husband IS older and an occasionally dry alcoholic). She's smart and nerdy, picks her own berries for jam every year, would LOVE someone who wanted to go to things like that but also happy to hang out at home quilting, loves cats, hardworking and down to earth. And her house has three stories so she's not afraid of stairs!!!

Seriously though - there's a woman like my sister out there for you somewhere, and when you find her she'll be THRILLED.
LOL - I believe that Dawn has already called dibs on me for her mother. I believe that one of the conditions is that I have to be able to say "y'all" with a straight face. One of the curses of my life - I'm such a "great" guy ...... for somebody else laugh

Appreciate the sentiment and smile though.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
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^^^^i hear that. I’m such a great girl for someone else.

Really though, I read your post and we do relationships very similarly. We should really start respecting our own needs. We could be the perfect mate...... but it’s honestly not enough. The other person has to be stepping up to the plate tkl

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