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A Message from Michele
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LBS script and Flying on instruments #2841844
03/14/19 11:42 PM
03/14/19 11:42 PM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
J
JimmyRig Offline OP
Member
JimmyRig  Offline OP
Member
J
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
Where are these posts?

thx


Me. 46
Her 37

Years together 10
Married 7.5

Kids 4 and 6
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2841926
03/15/19 12:32 PM
03/15/19 12:32 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 26,410
Southern Maryland
job Offline

Member
job  Offline

Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 26,410
Southern Maryland
Choppy,

Please stick to one thread until you have reached 100 postings/replies. I have merged your two threads together since you've not reached the limit. Also, you can change your subject line within a thread at any time.

Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2841969
03/15/19 04:40 PM
03/15/19 04:40 PM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
J
JimmyRig Offline OP
Member
JimmyRig  Offline OP
Member
J
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
I've implored the 180 and Last resort and been the best chill person I can. Getting stuff done around the house normal chores and taking care of the kids and a bit more and been conflict free for almost 3 week.

Now i'm seeing her mildly pissed off like Mort said I might bc I'm ruining her thought pattern of what she thought I would stay like. I'm not persuing or starting relationship convo's . But I feel Sunday she tried to bait me into an argument bring up moving on and apartments and space.

I stayed cool and told her "you need to do what you need to do" We ended the night by her going to the spare bedroom and all was cool with just a "good night" to each other.

Monday night she could have stayed at the house but decided to come for the walk with the dog and then Tuesday night offers to get me cookies and milk before we watch our DVR'd shows.

Thoughts? Is she reacting to the pull back or being nice to set me up for a bomb?


Me. 46
Her 37

Years together 10
Married 7.5

Kids 4 and 6
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2841970
03/15/19 04:55 PM
03/15/19 04:55 PM
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 2,864
L
LH19 Offline
Member
LH19  Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 2,864
Most likely both.

Choppy can you put your ages, years together/married children and ages in your signature?


M:50 W:45
T:22 M:16
S:14 D:10

“Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who really belong in your life - will come to you and stay.”- Will Smith
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2842321
03/18/19 11:50 AM
03/18/19 11:50 AM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
J
JimmyRig Offline OP
Member
JimmyRig  Offline OP
Member
J
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
Still no papers after being threatened weeks ago maybe even 2 months ago that "if you want the process to go faster then you do it" . I responded I don't want any of this except to make it better and work on it.

I guess no papers is good news and I'll just keep on keeping on and DB'ing do my best 180 and killing her with kindness and household responsibilities.


Me. 46
Her 37

Years together 10
Married 7.5

Kids 4 and 6
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2842326
03/18/19 12:10 PM
03/18/19 12:10 PM
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 2,864
L
LH19 Offline
Member
LH19  Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 2,864
C,

Be very careful with the killing her with kindness and chore responsibilities. You don't want to come off as a beta male man servant. Concentrate more on be busy by getting out and being mysterious.

Keep your expectations at zero. Usually when you take the pressure off it slows the process down.


M:50 W:45
T:22 M:16
S:14 D:10

“Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who really belong in your life - will come to you and stay.”- Will Smith
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2842334
03/18/19 12:42 PM
03/18/19 12:42 PM
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 5,701
S
Steve85 Offline
Member
Steve85  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 5,701
Remember, limbo, while it is torturous, is the gift of time! She could have filed immediately, and be rushing towards S and D. When that doesn't happen, view it as a second chance! And you are spot on with your approach. DB. 180s. Be kind in the face of her anger. Forge ahead. Many vets here say: hope for the best but prepare for the worst.


M(50), W(51),D(15)
M-20, T-22 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2842552
03/19/19 03:40 PM
03/19/19 03:40 PM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
J
JimmyRig Offline OP
Member
JimmyRig  Offline OP
Member
J
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
10 4 on that Steve85

Will do.


Me. 46
Her 37

Years together 10
Married 7.5

Kids 4 and 6
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2843406
03/26/19 02:40 PM
03/26/19 02:40 PM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
J
JimmyRig Offline OP
Member
JimmyRig  Offline OP
Member
J
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 87
Now its looking a bit more like Bi Polar of some level.
It does run in the family (brother was diagnosed with it)

Where do I go from here? I'm going to see our GP tonight so he can say I'm all good with my current dosage of Zoloft and Clanazapan (both are being taking bc of this marital turmoil).

But I'm going to bring up her moods and symptoms again. She has seen another doc in the practice and I'm her HIPPA contact so hopefully we can work out a plan.

Thoughts?


Me. 46
Her 37

Years together 10
Married 7.5

Kids 4 and 6
Re: LBS script and Flying on instruments [Re: JimmyRig] #2843409
03/26/19 03:06 PM
03/26/19 03:06 PM
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 5,701
S
Steve85 Offline
Member
Steve85  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 5,701
Originally Posted by Choppy
Now its looking a bit more like Bi Polar of some level.
It does run in the family (brother was diagnosed with it)

Where do I go from here? I'm going to see our GP tonight so he can say I'm all good with my current dosage of Zoloft and Clanazapan (both are being taking bc of this marital turmoil).

But I'm going to bring up her moods and symptoms again. She has seen another doc in the practice and I'm her HIPPA contact so hopefully we can work out a plan.

Thoughts?


Are you trying to fix her to help her? Or are you trying to fix her to save your marriage?


M(50), W(51),D(15)
M-20, T-22 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
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