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Link to old thread:

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2835073&#Post2835073

To anyone still following, thank you for the support. This site has been my lifeline and I’m here for anyone else going through a similar situation.

To sum up in a very very brief manner:

Husband becomes distant
Affair discovered
DB techniques applied
Reconciled
Unexpectedly got pregnant
Husband left
Husband initiated divorced
Divorced religiously and civil law
I began. To date someone else

So as outlined in my previous post, i met someone new. My ex has his suspicions but doesn’t know anything for definite. We are waiting until we are certain this will be a commitment before he meets the kids, ex is made aware etc (dating isn’t really allowed in Islam)

I feel happy, for the first time in years. I can be me and laugh and joke and be sarcastic without the eye rolls or the disapproving looks. I am enjoying feeling like me and feeling like a woman. And to anyone new, this is something i never ever thought was possible.

Ex is still trying his best for sex but not necessarily anything else. Of course i am not allowing this behavior. He is still very much the same and in his own bubble.

I shall try my best to be more active amongst this forum. I’m in no way an example of DBing to save my M. But i DB’d and saved my sanity.


Me 26 H 25
M 4
T 5
Baby born 4/14
BD: 1/15
EA: 2/15
PA: 4/15
reconciling: 4/15
ILYBINILWY- 11/15
ILY-1/16
ILYBNILWY 4/16
ILY 6/16
ILYBINILWY 6/16
Baby due 3/17
BD 8/16
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Hi Cherry,

I haven't had a chance to read through your saga and I hope to do so soon. I did catch the your last post of your previous thread and you mentioned Islam. Are you and/or your SO Muslim?


1/6/18-BD OM1
2/18-W meets OM2
4/18-W intros D4 to OM2
5/18-“Romance ends"
7/18-DB start
7/18-IHS Ends
4/19-WW moves out
3/21-D filed

Formerly pain18

Rise.

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Cherry Offline OP
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Hi, yes i am of Latina decent and him of bangali decent


Me 26 H 25
M 4
T 5
Baby born 4/14
BD: 1/15
EA: 2/15
PA: 4/15
reconciling: 4/15
ILYBINILWY- 11/15
ILY-1/16
ILYBNILWY 4/16
ILY 6/16
ILYBINILWY 6/16
Baby due 3/17
BD 8/16
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 4,227
Likes: 63
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CHERRY!!! (squeals like a little girl and runs up with a hug)


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
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I’d like to ask you, what duas helped you on your journey?


1/6/18-BD OM1
2/18-W meets OM2
4/18-W intros D4 to OM2
5/18-“Romance ends"
7/18-DB start
7/18-IHS Ends
4/19-WW moves out
3/21-D filed

Formerly pain18

Rise.

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Posts: 1,746
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Cherry Offline OP
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Andrew, my darling- how are you?
Kee
Phoenix, I’m not the best of Muslims, inshallah i hope to become better. Is did find that trying to get better at keeping my salah helped a lot, that eventually paved a way into believing that Allah (swt) has a plan for us and he only takes things away in order to give us something better.
I did read a dua quite often to reconcile hearts: dua to put faith into Allah. As well as Ayatul Kursi, surah yaseen. Reciting “alhamdulilah “ as often as possible. But ultimately, it took time to get there. And now i find mistletoe at peace with whatever happens is at allah’s will.


Me 26 H 25
M 4
T 5
Baby born 4/14
BD: 1/15
EA: 2/15
PA: 4/15
reconciling: 4/15
ILYBINILWY- 11/15
ILY-1/16
ILYBNILWY 4/16
ILY 6/16
ILYBINILWY 6/16
Baby due 3/17
BD 8/16
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 4,227
Likes: 63
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I'm doing reasonably well Cherry. Thanks for asking. Still single with nothing specific on the horizon. I've learned to cook a few new things which makes me happy. Fatter as well wink Need to work on that part.

Even though I'm not a person of faith, as a very good Muslim friend of mine will say in sha allah. Things will come when they come.

That's annoying that your ex is being so pesty - not really getting the fact that HE divorced you quite some time ago. Hopefully you can figure out some way to disengage from him. Is is mother still living with you?

Take care sweetie - glad you were able to stop by.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
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Posts: 1,746
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Cherry Offline OP
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Yeah she is. I am quite worried about breaking to her about someone else (if comes to that stage). Although she understands that at some point i would want to move on, i still thinks she hopes we could reconcile. I feel I’ve seen far too much ugly behavior and not enough change, in fact there has been none. Still obviously in a fog and focused upon himself.

Mashallah!! That’s good that you’ve learnt that.

Glad you’re getting on alright though. Hope it’s not too cold over your side? Here is freezing, and as per- Britain can’t cope!


Me 26 H 25
M 4
T 5
Baby born 4/14
BD: 1/15
EA: 2/15
PA: 4/15
reconciling: 4/15
ILYBINILWY- 11/15
ILY-1/16
ILYBNILWY 4/16
ILY 6/16
ILYBINILWY 6/16
Baby due 3/17
BD 8/16
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 937
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Posts: 937
Hi Cherry,

I remember your posts from when I first joined this forum. It's good to hear you met someone new! I hope to have time to read through your whole situation sometime soon. It sounds like you documented it well here. I don't remember if you filed for divorce or your ex-husband did? Does he share custody with your kids? How does your new partner react to what you went through with your ex-husband? It'd be great to hear more details when you have time!

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Dear Cherry,

Glad to see you are moving on. It's a good thing and you have taken time to try the alternatives.

Don't worry about it. Just do it but with the careful approach you have is my advice. I know you will. I have too : ).

Surfer.


M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids
Issues2009
Wpartying w/g.f's2013on
EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR
ImeetAP/EAhalts
VariousBDDates
MFCourse
WSpew
EAresumes I halt
Wrages
DBIng4/2016




Joined: Jun 2016
Posts: 1,273
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Hey!

Hows it going?

Surfer


M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids
Issues2009
Wpartying w/g.f's2013on
EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR
ImeetAP/EAhalts
VariousBDDates
MFCourse
WSpew
EAresumes I halt
Wrages
DBIng4/2016




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