Had a great IC session. Focusing on me. Manifesting the best I want in life by focusing on positive thoughts, consistent actions. W is her own person and outside my control and my area of concern. Shes finally starting to work next week so thats a positive step. Be grateful for what you have and hopeful for what you want. Cheers to all
Last edited by Did; 01/09/1906:35 PM.
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18
Glad you had a good session with your IC. I am pretty new to all this but it really is about working on you, your wants and needs, and not bothering to try and control anything but you. Good job and hang in there!
Me40; W38; S12; D9 BD11/19/2018 D filed 12/20/18 D Final 7/2020 Being the best example I know how for my kids to see.
I’ve been up w D4 since 12. Doubt she will be able to go to school. If you can help at some point feel like I’m dying
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18
If you chose to help your D4, then that's fine. But helping doesn't involve the 3 of you all together. Helping is you going to pick up D4 and bring her back to your house and let W take care of herself. Don't ask if she needs anything, don't stay, nothing. If your D4 needs you, then get her. Your wife if a big girl and can take care of herself.
Thank you Ginger. Unfortunately I have a 130 appointment closer to W house so for D4 all I can do is pick her up after that which was the plan. I was supposed to get her at 315 after school. So I guess that is my answer? I’ll pick up D4 as soon as I can - after my 130 appt.
Ideally there would be a way for me to create some positivity or breakthrough between us. But I suppose there’s nothing really I can do except be my best self.
Just going to say I have a lot of work today and will be there as soon as I can which will be around 3. Good luck. Hope D4 is feeling ok.
Want to throw in more positivity but pointless to even waste my mental energy.
Last edited by Cadet; 01/30/1907:52 PM. Reason: combine posts
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18
Ideally there would be a way for me to create some positivity or breakthrough between us. But I suppose there’s nothing really I can do except be my best self.
Huh? How so? Your idea of positivity unfortunately is very codependent with her where you cater to her.
Positivity is taking care of your daughter if you can. You have to stop making everything you do about her. She's go you wrapped around her little finger
Last edited by Cadet; 01/30/1907:53 PM. Reason: fix html
I want to help but it’s inappropriate and we’re not even close to being together. I say things here instead of to her.
I said - Sorry it was a rough night. I have to work and have a meeting. I’ll pick up D4 as soon as I can. Around 3
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18
it wasn't weak. It was way too wordy. Your biggest problem with your interactions with your STBXW are that you say too much.
Remember the principle:
Do not answer unless there is a direct question. In the event of a direct question, answer (in your own time, not right away), but with as few words as possible. Yes or no questions get yes or no answers.
ovrrnbw nailed it with his suggestion.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
