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Agree, 100%.


M: 43, H: 44
Married 18 yrs, Together 26 yrs
S17, D15, D8, S6
Still living in MH
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Originally Posted by LoneWlf
thanks RR.

Most of this week I was away at a convention. I came home to S. My sister spoiled him while I was gone. S informs me today that there are parent teacher interviews next week. I respond that I will be going to meet all his teachers and would like him to hear what they have to say. Then I say I will inform W because I am sure she is interested in how he is doing. He says I don't want mom to go. I try to validate by saying I can appreciate that you are angry but I think letting your mom know is the right thing to do and besides she can choose weather to go. S says if mom goes -I'm not going!..My question is what do I do now?


LW, buddy, this shouldn't even be up for debate. Tell mom.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

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LoneWlf Offline OP
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Thank you all for your feedback. I will inform W of interviews. Just a tidbit. I have been GALing by going to the gym and also to the dog park. Well yesterday I was speaking with a nice lady who is a figure skating instructor. We got on the topic of hockey. I said I played pick up many years ago. She said her brothers played semi pro. Anyways she asked me over to her place to watch the hockey game. At this point just a nice lady- I debating weather or not to go. Just to watch the game that is. Another lady at the dog park , again no romantic interest on my part - asked if i was open to go for coffee? Not sure what to do but it does the ego good. LOL. I have to sit and think about it.


M51 w50
T-20Yrs M-16Yrs
S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up
1 Awesum dog
BD 10/31/17
separate rooms 02/08/18
wife moved out 05/17/18

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It does do the ego good.

It can go a long way toward detachment. I have to ask why your ego needs that type of confirmation.

I for one committed that if I were to become single, I would go a year without dating. Cathartic or whatever, it seems like a prudent idea. If you don't address the emotional luggage that leads to your break up, you are destined to bring it to your next relationship. Happens all the time.
Most LBH reach conclusions upon BD that ultimately make them a better partner. GAL, IMO works to make us centered, autonomous and confident mates. Doing so through confirmation of another W interest is not the same. Much as the dynamic with OM in an affair sitch. It seldom works out well.

Search a church series by Andy Stanley "The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating"

Hope this helps.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
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I just ran across this on FB.


"It's my ex-wife's birthday today so I got up early and brought flowers and cards and a gift over for the kids to give her and helped them make her breakfast. Per usual someone asked me why the hell I still do things for her all the time. This annoys me. So ima break it down for you all.

I'm raising two little men. The example I set for how I treat their mom is going to significantly shape how they see and treat women and affect their perception of relationships. I think even more so in my case because we are divorced. So if you aren't modeling good relationship behavior for your kids, get your s%$# together. Rise above it and be an example. This is bigger than you.

Raise good men. Raise strong women. Please. The world needs them, now more than ever."

Last edited by RR17; 10/14/18 01:44 AM.

M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 603
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LoneWlf Offline OP
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RR and everyone thanks for the sound advice and support. After letting W know about the parent teacher interviews- wife finally responded by asking what date. His interviews are to occur Thursday this week. Initially W texted me that Thursday was no good that she had plans. I texted her if she planned on going. W responded-If teachers are asking to meet with us then - yes she would go. If not- then just let her know of any concerns. I texted back- Teachers not asking- I plan on going- I will let you know of any concerns. She asked do I have meetings booked already? Can i send her the details - please let her know. I texted- I have sent in my request to meet his teachers.I will let you know. She said thanks.

This is the most we have texted- it just happened now. Timing is good- just got a haircut on the weekend and some new clothes for work. Gonna look good- feel good and project a alpha male mentality with actions not words.

Thank you all- Blessings!


M51 w50
T-20Yrs M-16Yrs
S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up
1 Awesum dog
BD 10/31/17
separate rooms 02/08/18
wife moved out 05/17/18

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btw- I forgot to add W plans on going.


M51 w50
T-20Yrs M-16Yrs
S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up
1 Awesum dog
BD 10/31/17
separate rooms 02/08/18
wife moved out 05/17/18

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LW, keep it up! You're an inspiration to us all. You've kept such a good attitude through all of this, I always enjoy reading your updates. This shows that DBing is always successful.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
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Good to hear LW, sounds like you are heading in the right direction.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 216
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Originally Posted by LoneWlf


This is the most we have texted- it just happened now. Timing is good- just got a haircut on the weekend and some new clothes for work. Gonna look good- feel good and project a alpha male mentality with actions not words.


Very nice. Glad to hear about the communication and best of all that you feel good about it. This is a really nice step in the right direction, very proud of you!


M: 43, H: 44
Married 18 yrs, Together 26 yrs
S17, D15, D8, S6
Still living in MH
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