Thanks for checking in V. From here it looked like you had dropped off the face of the earth so I was worried.
For me I find that more and more I have little to offer, especially to the newbies on the board. It's been some months since I last posted to one or followed their stories. I am sure that they appreciate your kindness and insight but I also fully understand how it can be triggering and a reminder of your own trauma. Like they tell us when we board an airplane, we all need to remember to take care of ourselves first.
I've not used a pressure cooker before. I have a crock-pot which is indispensable to me which I use for soups and stews as well as roasts.
I do hope that the G is only passing through or that he was a mirage. I'm fortunate in that my own ex is I believe afraid to encounter me. Not that she has anything to fear from me other than the truth.
Thanks again - get well, and perhaps some Scottish Adonis may cross your path when you least expect it.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Life is very full, no time to think about anything other than healing, working and survival. I need a short break from the board and holding to surviving. That's all I can do for the moment.
I cry most days these days, just tiredness and general fed up.
The very old boiler at the Big House failed and is being replaced, the cistern cracked and leaked. Life is tough as it's going to cost a great deal. Its overwhelming to me., and means working extra hard.
I am still using a fasting regime to finish off the weight loss, hopefully it's the home straights, sadly be a use of stress my body is very insulin resistant at the moment and blood sugar is far too high. Its the Warburg effect.
A break is what you need in order to focus on you and what you need to do to survive I am sorry that some of the things in the Big House are breaking down. Hopefully, you will be able to get them all fixed and back up and running in no time.
Please take all of the time you need. We will be right here waiting for your return with open arms. Please take care of yourself.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Vanilla my lovely, as long as we have breath we have hope for better times. I too have been crying more lately. I think in my case it's because I just went through two months of intense purging, hard physical labor of constant packing and moving that was extended because I had to also work full time and had a deadline. So .. lots and lots of 'go go go get this done' and now, the aftermath.
You've had triggers from your friend's situation, remember, and sightings of G in the village are going to set that off even more. Money worries are no joke. I've had a few myself lately. Do what you need to do to replenish yourself body and soul. We love you and are here when you are ready and able to come back xoxoxoxo much love my dear V xoxoxo
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 H moved out 4/24/15 D Final 12/23/16