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#2780811 03/06/18 02:19 PM
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I haven’t started a new thread in forever so I forgot how to do it. Same old same old here but need to post more. I need to get to a new place :-)

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2780810&#Post2780810



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
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Quote:
Upon further review I’ll just pass. Nothing to come from this so may as well not start it.


Ummm....so are you making a commitment to stay single? If so, that's fine. But if you actually would prefer to be in a relationship, I do NOT understand why you wouldn't at least go out on a dinner date with this guy? (Or is there something you omitted from the story, like he's married, a homeless bum, or 20 years younger???)

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I'd love to know too - but much more for personal reasons. I will say, your reaction and possible final decision is common - far too common. So you're not alone. What I'd love to know is why, as this has happened to me too many times to count - although I'd not call myself very attractive. But far too many times I've asked someone out, been told no, yet they don't go onto date anyone else either - often for years! I've more and more come to realize it's not me, but what then? Help me and others understand why someone you appear to be attracted to, were somewhat flattered or at least surprised he was interested in you, and somewhat excited by is not worthy of even a single date? I don't get it - but would love to. smile. (In more ways than one).


DonH
Midwest
Me 56
WAW-EXW 55
Met 11/95 / Married 5/00
Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06
4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
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Yes, I am interested in your answer.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


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me too.


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver
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Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all of the responses. If I haven’t mentioned it before, I have a tendency to be all bark and no bite and I’m a sucker for a really hot guy. So, I met him for a drink yesterday. I want to be clear....this has the potential to be nothing more than a hook up so I’m not crazy and delusional. What I’ve struggled with is NG. I told him I didn’t see our R as serious anymore. I told him that about a month or month and a half ago. For those of you following along, he kinda disappeared and had a break down for about 5 months. And while I supported him, the way he handled things changed the way I viewed our R. I still like hanging out with him but I just feel different. Sooooo, I knew if I met this guy for a drink I would be tempted to at least make out with him. I’m not good at this new world we live in where everyone has rosters of folks to date :-)

Anyway. I met the guy at his favorite watering hole. The age range of customers was lots of senior citizens but they all hugged him and he was very polite. When he would introduce me, the women would take me aside and say “he’s such a nice young man and look at him!” I’m many things but blind isn’t one of him.

I was nervous about going but I figured it wouldn’t matter in the long run. Sooooo.... we did shots, danced (things get dicey when I dance in public) and made out in public. Again, this was nothing but fun but he called me today and said he had a good time. I said I did too. There is your update.

Going to NY for 2 days this week for work. Hope everyone had a good weekend.



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,913
Likes: 316
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So you still haven't explained WHY this guy only has hookup potential.

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Because I’m pretty sure this guy is a player and not looking for anything. And that’s totally okay smile



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,922
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So NG is coming over tonight. Although it’s been about 20 months but it’s been an interesting 20 months. I’m going to a thing later this month where I will see the guy I was mega attracted to will be there. I’m hoping that has faded. Guess I will see. It’s actually much easier not being attracted to folks.

Happy Monday :-)



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,922
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So on my journey to Seattle today, I think I realized something. I’ve always known it instinctually but I keep fighting it. I’m probably never going to find that attraction to someone where it’s reciprocated – even for just a fling. Yes, there was the hook up guy right after my divorce but that wasn’t really reciprocated. So perhaps it’s time for me to really take a look at what I can and cannot handle. Just realized that we don’t always get what we want course. I already knew that. But this seems to be something that a lot of people find and they’re not happy with. But I just can’t get anyone to want to? Which probably is funny to a lot of people who know me because according to society, even though I’m 45, I’m
allegedly one of the good looking people. Doesn’t ever feel that way and that ship is sailing fast :-). If it hasn’t already sailed.



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
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