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mxdup Offline OP
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Yes we are still in the same house and she is still sleeping in our marital bed beside me each night. She has not packed one item but has mentioned that she will be gone within a month (early Oct). I think she is trying to get a rise out of me as our counselor (she no longer goes) has said that she has 6 out of 7 traits of a passive aggressive. Essentially she wants me to get angry so she can prove herself right. I also believe she is in MLC as she mentions her Dad getting too old to have fun with anymore and has recited her going to be 40 soon (she just turned 38).


BD: 5/28/17 "We're like roommates, there is no passion anymore"
Early October she is moving out so she can "think about what she really wants in life"
10/22/17 She's gone
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Originally Posted By: mxdup
Just a quick update:

The W and I spent labor day together hiking and talking. We talked like friends about our hopes and dreams. She seemed to talk about grandiose ideas which did not include a man (myself included). When we got home for the day, she went right back into P/A mode saying something about what a great guy I am and how she hopes I can find a really nice girl.


Someone above suggested that there were signs of a third party in the mix? So is this.


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mxdup Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: EastTN
Someone above suggested that there were signs of a third party in the mix? So is this.


I'll admit that I have done no snooping to find out. Our MC straight out asked her and she said no. She has given me no reason to believe there is another man either.

Based on everything I've read I should not acknowledge any OM and work only on myself. Is that wrong?


BD: 5/28/17 "We're like roommates, there is no passion anymore"
Early October she is moving out so she can "think about what she really wants in life"
10/22/17 She's gone
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No, it's not wrong. But it DOES change things. By doing things with her, you're letting her eat cake. She gets all the benefits of your M, PLUS whatever she gets out of a third party, if there is one.


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Yeh it definitely changes things. Right now it looks all loosey-goosey and you're just going along. I think it's time for some action.

If you can't physically separate, and there is a real possibility of an OM - you need to DB hard. Otherwise, she will keep eating cake and you're going to be miserable and in limbo.
Best example of someone who did this - TxHubby. Have you read his sitch?


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Originally Posted By: Maika
Yeh it definitely changes things. Right now it looks all loosey-goosey and you're just going along. I think it's time for some action.

If you can't physically separate, and there is a real possibility of an OM - you need to DB hard. Otherwise, she will keep eating cake and you're going to be miserable and in limbo.
Best example of someone who did this - TxHubby. Have you read his sitch?


No but thank you I will


BD: 5/28/17 "We're like roommates, there is no passion anymore"
Early October she is moving out so she can "think about what she really wants in life"
10/22/17 She's gone
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No as in - you can't physically separate?


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Okay - so I quickly went back and read some of your earlier posts to get a handle on your sitch.

She's not leaving, but wants to live a single life and have her own apartment - that's classic living in either a fantasy affair or there is someone already.

Looks like MC sessions aren't helping and her wanting to be your friend is not helping you either.

You're still in the marital bed with her but nothing going on right? Is that working for you?

So, what are you going to do?


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mxdup Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: Maika
No as in - you can't physically separate?


We can physically separate in the same house. I meant no I hadn't read his sich


BD: 5/28/17 "We're like roommates, there is no passion anymore"
Early October she is moving out so she can "think about what she really wants in life"
10/22/17 She's gone
Joined: Jul 2017
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In house separations are not good for your emotional and mental sanity. I did it briefly and it was horrendous.

Has she brought up moving out recently? I am guessing you're busy, but you haven't answered my other questions.

What's up?


No one is coming to save you!

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